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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I run away from friendships

1 reply

Halfmanhalfcake · 29/12/2023 11:51

Im just trying to get the bottom of why I might do this. I form friendships easily. People seem to think I’m ok, so not problem in developing the first stages of friendships and even more. However as soon as a friendship becomes too demanding, or they do something that I can legitimately get annoyed by rather than talking it through or just getting over it I’ll run away.

I have a couple of friends from a long time ago. But most of my freindhips transition whenever I have a life change, eg starting work, leaving work, having kids, moving house etc.

I’m sure that’s the same for many people but I just seem to be unable to maintain the friendship once my circumstances have changed. It’s a trait I don’t like, but it’s almost as if I can’t see beyond the friendships that are immediately in front of me.

I’d really like to change this, and I think understanding why I do it might help.
i always put it down to the fact that I have a close family and partner and so never had the element of needing to rely on friends for real support. Now I’m older I’m not so sure that’s the answer. I look at people with big groups of friends that they’ve collected and maintained I’ve the years with envy.

Id just like to learn how to maintain all those types of friendships at once!

OP posts:
Whiskerson · 29/12/2023 20:26

I'm a bit like this, and I'm going to give your thread a bump in the hope that people will be along to share their insights!

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