Abusive XH and DS7 friends and parents

[Anewnamejustforthis]

Abusive XH is not really bothered about our son - does the minimum, except when he can play Disney Dad in front of others. He has now struck up a friendship with DS best friend's parents (who know some of what went on but no detail), and it hurts...I know he's allowed to have friends, and to move on, but knowing how manipulative he is, and how soft-hearted they are, I am worried that he will play the victim - which he does so well, I believed it myself for years. It feels wrong that he has access to DS friends when he behaved so badly to DS (emotional and occasional physical abuse) and I'm worried that he will convince the family (and thereby friend and ultimately DS) that I lied ... he tells people that I over-reacted to "normal" behaviour ... and I have lost other friends for this reason already.

Should I be more honest with friend's parents about what happened so they are on their guard, or will that just make me look like the crazy ex? I am v low contact with XH to try and rebuild my mental health (DS sees him as he should), but this feels too close, and a threat to the stability I am gradually building for me and DS after many difficult years.

Tell them.
I was being friendly to the dad of one of my sons friends for ages until I was told he had been horrifically violent to his ex. I was mortified.
If these parents are decent people they will believe you and they will want to know.

Tell them.

I think you don't have to go into extreme detail but I think you can very calmly / neutrally explain while this is awkward/ difficult conversation it's important they understand and have full context.

Your DH is very charming/charismatic but behind closed doors was physically and emotionally abusive to both you and your child.
You know they are good people and won't disclose this directly back to your exH but you would appreciate if they were alert to this.

Thank you both, I have been in touch with the family ... and XH had already started to tell them untruths, so they were really pleased I was honest with them and are now revising plans accordingly. I'm very grateful for your advice, having been on the receiving end of abuse I sometimes struggle to know what reaction is appropriate.