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Original poster

Husband lost temper with three year old

39 replies

Jules446 · 28/12/2023 13:58

Husband was building three year old’s bike. Three year old was trying to get on said bike and not giving DH much space. DH lost his patience and lifted son up on quite a forceful manner, shouted that his behaviour was unacceptable and set him on the back step. Three year was very upset. I went outside to comfort three year old, brought him inside for a cuddle and reassured him that Daddy had lost his patience etc. but I am really not happy.

OP posts:
triballeader · 28/12/2023 14:54

TBH assembling a bike even a small child’s bike is potentially dangerous. Shouting at a child and tween physically removing from said risk would be proportional especially if said child had not listened to previous instructions to sit and watch only. It’s a six of one and half a dozen of the other parenting situation. If your husband is working on something involving tools that you know your three year old is very interested in then you should have supervised them and not left it to your husband to do whilst assembling said bike for them. If your son had succeeded in climbing on a half assembled bike he could have been injured and that would hurt far more than his dad shouting and physically removing him from said situation.

Maybe in future be prepared to occupy your son or encourage him to watch daddy through a window and wait till daddy has finished working to go and see what he has done.

Highlyflavouredgravy · 28/12/2023 14:54

Sounds like dad acted entirely appropriately

Hercisback · 28/12/2023 14:56

You've undermined your husband, failed to help when he was trying to do something nice, and now are in a strop with him. Sounds like your 3yo has no boundaries from you. People shout occasionally, that's life.

Whinge · 28/12/2023 14:58

arewedoneyet · 28/12/2023 14:47

I don't think your husband did anything wrong

Me either. 🤷🏻‍♀️ But the OP was definitely in the wrong for undermining him in front of their child.

muggart · 28/12/2023 14:59

Hercisback · 28/12/2023 14:56

You've undermined your husband, failed to help when he was trying to do something nice, and now are in a strop with him. Sounds like your 3yo has no boundaries from you. People shout occasionally, that's life.

I think this says it all!

The kid was bound to get excitable over the building of a new bike, how could you not see this coming and step into help DH?

Balloonhearts · 28/12/2023 15:00

He did nothing wrong. He told off a three year old who was misbehaving and firmly removed them. That's called discipline. What you're doing is going to create a spoilt, disrespectful child. Why were you apologising when you should have been backing up your DH?

I'd have said to him Daddy shouted at you because you were getting in the way and not listening when he told you to stop and get off. You need to listen when we're telling you not to do something.

No wonder kids are growing up so entitled and disrespectful if this is how they are brought up with no discipline or consequences and parents afraid to tell them off in case they scare or upset them.

pictoosh · 28/12/2023 15:05

Well...none of us were there were we? Could be something, could be nothing. Kids are exasperating getting in the way but he certainly might have called through and asked you to keep ds occupied. We don't always behave in the way we would with the benefit of hindsight.

Falifornia · 28/12/2023 15:30

amylou8 · 28/12/2023 14:47

He removed a misbehaving 3 year old and told him off. Now you're pandering to him. Good luck with that one when he's 15.

@amylou8 nailed it in 3 sentences

eandz13 · 28/12/2023 15:31

🤦🏻‍♀️

HappyHamsters · 28/12/2023 15:35

I don't suppose your husband is happy either, probably the last time he bothers trying to do something nice.

craigth162 · 28/12/2023 15:39

Itslegitimatesalvage · 28/12/2023 14:49

Your poor husband. Jesus. He didn’t do anything wrong. Where were you? Why didn’t you entertain the kid while he was building the thing?

He told his kid that his behaviour was unacceptable and moved him. That’s good. Kids need to be told, and from an early age. Your 3 year old needs to learn and listen to the word “no.” I hope you’re going to let this go because you’re wrong.

This

blackpooolrock · 28/12/2023 16:57

Sounds like your DH done nothing wrong, what he done was normal behaviour.

You need to support your DH more and stop being so sensitive.

momonpurpose · 28/12/2023 17:02

starynightskys · 28/12/2023 14:30

My first thought as well.

Show quote history

My first thought too

starynightskys · 28/12/2023 17:12

Balloonhearts · 28/12/2023 15:00

He did nothing wrong. He told off a three year old who was misbehaving and firmly removed them. That's called discipline. What you're doing is going to create a spoilt, disrespectful child. Why were you apologising when you should have been backing up your DH?

I'd have said to him Daddy shouted at you because you were getting in the way and not listening when he told you to stop and get off. You need to listen when we're telling you not to do something.

No wonder kids are growing up so entitled and disrespectful if this is how they are brought up with no discipline or consequences and parents afraid to tell them off in case they scare or upset them.

Edited

This nails it 100%

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