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Original poster

Child’s father

9 replies

isitharassment · 26/12/2023 23:41

My child’s father came to visit her today he hardly ever sees her doesn’t pay for anything except one time he payed £10 for a gift he sent off eBay for her birthday last month cos he couldn’t be bothered to come then.
I went out on a walk to give them some alone time my weekly shopping was due to arrive which he knew and I left him to bring it in which he said he would I had treats in the shop for DD and he sent them away with the driver because he didn’t agree with what I was giving her she’s not skinny or fat she’s healthy.
big back story but he is a terrible person with terrible friends and insults and belittles me I don’t think he really has the right to make parenting decisions but he’s on the birth certificate and he’s been talking about wanting to see her more except he lives in England hours and hours away and she’s 5. I don’t want him to go for custody

OP posts:
AmazingDayz · 26/12/2023 23:44

Did you tell him they were for her? How did he know?

Pallisers · 26/12/2023 23:45

He won't go for custody. Come on - he doesn't even want to see his child. His sending away the food was a last, pretty stupid, attempt to have a go at you, upset you, and control you. just laugh and say "gosh you haven't changed have you", say goodbye and the next time he wants to see your child suggest he applies to court and they can deal with the child support at the same time and then it will all be sorted.

And honestly don't ever leave him alone in your house again no matter what. He is not your friend. He doesn't want the best for you. he probably wants the opposite. It is like letting a wolf into your home.

Original poster
isitharassment · 26/12/2023 23:46

AmazingDayz · 26/12/2023 23:44

Did you tell him they were for her? How did he know?

They weren’t the sort of thing an adult would usually have?

OP posts:
Pallisers · 26/12/2023 23:49

what does it matter how he knew or what he knew. He sent back food paid for and ordered by another adult. He is a cunt and he did it to be a cunt.

Original poster
isitharassment · 26/12/2023 23:51

Pallisers · 26/12/2023 23:45

He won't go for custody. Come on - he doesn't even want to see his child. His sending away the food was a last, pretty stupid, attempt to have a go at you, upset you, and control you. just laugh and say "gosh you haven't changed have you", say goodbye and the next time he wants to see your child suggest he applies to court and they can deal with the child support at the same time and then it will all be sorted.

And honestly don't ever leave him alone in your house again no matter what. He is not your friend. He doesn't want the best for you. he probably wants the opposite. It is like letting a wolf into your home.

He’s been talking about it recently and mentioning taking her to see her grandparents which isn’t happening and I’m not a fan of her grandma anyway.
I don’t want him to have custody as I don’t want her to be influenced by the way he behaves and speaks to me.

OP posts:
AmazingDayz · 26/12/2023 23:51

I’m trying to understand why he would do that, it’s clearly odd as it could have been for relatives children/ friends! Anything! Could have been gifts, so it makes no sense either he is nuts or you are oversharing a bit more than you need to?

Pallisers · 26/12/2023 23:56

*I don’t want him to have custody as I don’t want her to be influenced by the way he behaves and speaks to me.

but you left him in your home alone with your DD and asked him to take in your shopping. Come on OP, you need to toughen up. He is not your friend. he should not be in your home. He should go through the courts if he wants to see his child. He should pay child support. He is doing a number on you. Ignore him and if he mentions custody say "yes, can't imagine THAT given your track record for the last 5 years but rock on. I'll be submitting a CSA claim now that you mention it going for the legal option."

Psychoticbreak · 27/12/2023 09:00

Im wondering and confused as to why you would allow him into your home or 'let' him take in your shopping.

MintJulia · 27/12/2023 09:10

This is a man who turns up to see his child once, presumably because he saw his parents over xmas and they nagged him into it.

He won't go for custody, too much like hard work and responsibility. If he cared, he'd have been attentive from the start.

Say no to taking your dc anywhere until he applies to court, and starts paying to help support his child.

Just ignore his interference, don't leave him alone in your house again, and his neglect of his child will be back to normal by NYE.

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