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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Abusive behaviour

7 replies

Charlene46 · 26/12/2023 21:21

Husband wanted to cook Xmas eve dinner which was fine by me as I’m in the early stages of pregnancy and am very nauseous. I went into the kitchen to get a tablecloth and as I opened the cupboard a small bowl fell out and broke in half. Husband turns round and gets really angry asking me what the hell am I doing in the kitchen, get out before I smack you (one) as he didn’t finish what he was going to say. I was very upset told him it was an accident but I can’t stop thinking about what happened

OP posts:
Ohthiscantbeit · 26/12/2023 21:25

Sorry to hear this, are you ok?

Original poster
Charlene46 · 26/12/2023 21:33

Yes I’m fine but it was so upsetting and not even the hint of an apology.
During dinner he said I should have helped him !

OP posts:
TitaniumTess · 26/12/2023 22:17

Sorry to hear. Has he done similar before?

I was in an emotionally abusive relationship and didn't realise how far in I had got....

I started to read about emotional abuse and the articles felt like my life. I also started to keep a diary at work to see any patterns of behaviour, as I felt that I had perspective there. Please take care. Xx

Santaisscouringindeedfornewjob · 26/12/2023 22:18

Bet he wasn't a twat before you got pregnant...
Ime things will get progressively worse..

spookehtooth · 26/12/2023 22:21

Charlene46 · 26/12/2023 21:33

Yes I’m fine but it was so upsetting and not even the hint of an apology.
During dinner he said I should have helped him !

Bit late, no? He should've asked for help when he needed it, not when it's too late 🤷‍♂️ I'm assuming you have no mind reading skills? If this is a pattern of behaviour, definitely abuse

ToBeOrNotToBee · 26/12/2023 22:23

Get out now.
DA often starts and gets worse during pregnancy.
I'd also be very wary of being tied to someone like that for life.

Ohthiscantbeit · 27/12/2023 11:21

When everything has settled, (discuss in a safe environment) take time to try and discuss how his behaviour upset you. And when he is feeling these types of explosive emotions what can be done to navigate it to produce a positive outcome.

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