Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What can I do?

9 replies

isitharassment · 24/12/2023 13:21

When my ex and I were in a relationship he was still in contact with a , A, who he had been in on and off contact with for years. He posed A “as just as friend”. There’s a backstory to this if you catch my drift. He had a lot of ex’s like that in his life who’s relationship would take priority over ours and it was one of the main reasons we’re not together any more.
the other month I got threatening messages from his friends that they deleted before I thought to take a photo which turned out to be a cruel prank.
in the past few weeks I’ve been contacted separately by 3 friends of A, I’ve noticed a pattern of pretending to be concerned about me then they will say something nasty and block me after taking photos of the conversation to share and laugh about. I know because my ex told me. I’ve just been sent a friend request off a new account that looks very similar to the ones I’ve been getting them from and I won’t be speaking to them about anything. I’ve told my ex to tell them to stop but is there a way I can play them at their own game or get back at them sort of thing. I’ve been totally humiliated

OP posts:
yellowsmileyface · 24/12/2023 13:26

Why waste your time and energy trying to play them at their own game? All that will achieve is showing them that they've got to you. Best thing you can do is make all of your SM accounts private and don't add or speak to people you don't know.

ValerieMoore · 24/12/2023 13:48

Learn how to be a creep I suppose but do you really have time for that

EmptyYoghurtPot · 24/12/2023 13:50

Don’t play them at their own game. Block them and move on. They sound very immature. Bullies soon find a new target if they don’t get a reaction.

ArgueWithATree · 24/12/2023 14:22

If I were you I wouldn't engage. Either deactivate your socials or lock them down and don't accept any more friend requests unless you are sure you know who it is.

It's very petty of them and they've obviously got too much time on their hands! Living well is the best revenge.

Pinkbonbon · 24/12/2023 14:31

Is it his friends or is it actually just him making fake accounts?

Sorry but I believe it's your ex.
Either that or he's encouraging them.
But most likely it's just him.

Nasty abusive shitheads like him like to try and make you feel the whole world is against you.

And it seems obvious he is such a character as he appears to have used 'narcissistic triangulation' to play you off against other women when you were together.

Stop accepting friend requests from people you don't know. Remove any from your friends list. Take no chances. Beware if unknown callers too.

Stop communicating with your ex.
If you have kids together, adopt the 'grey rock' technique.

Pinkbonbon · 24/12/2023 14:43

'A new account that looks very similar from the ones I've been getting them from'
Should be your first clue really. It's much more likely that it's one asshole ex making all these similar looking accounts.

Not to say a bunch of people can't be assholes of course. But I guarantee you that one way or the other, he is at the heart of it.

Its even him telling you about these people supposedly laughing at you. Getting a kick out of telling you this shit.

Block HIM.

StrawberryWater · 24/12/2023 21:31

Block move on and if it keeps up log it with the police. They probably won't do anything but sometimes low level harassment turns into more so it's important someone else knows about it.

isitharassment · 24/12/2023 23:12

I’ve just realised my Spotify has new songs added to my playlist I’ve never heard of or listened to my ex knew my passwords he’s just admitted he vented to A about me told her everything

OP posts:
Opentooffers · 25/12/2023 00:28

Right well, have some pride and don't become the next ex who stays in contact as a 'friend'. Why are you taking his texts or calls about it all? He's playing you all off against each other. Also, why would you even be engaging in conversation with his ex's or their friends? Do you talk to anyone who sends a message? Make you SM visible to friends only and block your ex - that is just basic, and avoids all this.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page