Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I do it all but he says I don’t do anything for him?

13 replies

Wanderlustloner · 24/12/2023 12:35

Hi all

so we have a 1 year old I work from home full time, I pay the full rent, I pay the bills(in debt and struggling), I apply for jobs for my partner (he does but his picky), I cook, I clean, I do the groceries, I tidy, I run errands, I look after our baby whilst I work, I pick up after him, I do nothing for myself and I’m always exhausted and in arguments he says “you don’t do anything for me” “what do you even do for me” “I don’t ask you to do anything” (referring to chores/cooking) he never asks me to do them or rarely but if I don’t do it no one will? He never tells me to wash the clothes but if I don’t do it no one ever does? He doesn’t ask me to clean but if i don’t do it it becomes inhabitable and so I have to as no one else does? He doesn’t ask me to put away his clothes but throws them on the floor and they stay there if I don’t? I clothe our child I do it al. If I don’t do it no one will then he says I don’t take care of him sexually and his low maintenance and I should take care of him like that sometimes when I turn him down several times he just goes silent on me other times he continues to ask. I sometimes just do even if I’m exhausted just to get him to shut up and leave me alone but it still continues.. I just don’t understand how he says I don’t do anything for hom? He said even if he left I would need to still do all this so I’m not doing anything for him? But he does nothing for me at all? Cleans once every 4/5 weeks like just putting the toys away or throwing stuff in the bin and that’s it

OP posts:
Haffiana · 24/12/2023 17:46

Kneel down before him and ask him what else you can do? Beg him to disrespect you some more?

What do you want us to say exactly, OP?

Dacadactyl · 24/12/2023 17:52

Why are you with him?!

Just dump him already. Its not even like you can't afford to live without him!

Blueeyedmale · 24/12/2023 17:55

Ltb what a dick

Consideringachange2023 · 24/12/2023 18:02

He says you don’t do anything for him because he wants to upset you, disrespect you and for you to feel shit about yourself - enough that you don’t question his faults and failures and that you try even harder to keep him happy. And whilst you’re doing all that you’ll be too busy to realise what an absolute waste of space he is.

Seriously OP, how did you end up in a relationship with someone who clearly doesn’t like you or care about you? Was he always like this? Did you spend the honeymoon wiping his arse as well?

DidiAskYouThough · 24/12/2023 18:04

Just dump him. Nothing more to it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

category12 · 24/12/2023 18:06

What are you with him for?

Dingdongdog · 24/12/2023 18:08

Get rid. Please have a look at yourself to work on why you have such low standards.
Good luck x

ReadySalty · 24/12/2023 18:09

Get out now, he's an utter child.

Grimchmas · 24/12/2023 18:11

What does he do that justifies giving him a place in your precious life?

Inaspot21 · 24/12/2023 18:14

He said it all himself. ‘Even if he wasn’t there you’d still have to do all those things’, well what’s the point of him then!! Sounds like you have an easier life without him in it tbh

Nanny0gg · 24/12/2023 18:14

Oh come on.

What's the point of him?

Why are you allowing him to treat you like this?

WashItTomorrow · 24/12/2023 18:16

Leave him. Come on, it’s obvious.

cestlavielife · 24/12/2023 18:20

Why why why?
Was yourmother a slave to your father?
This man hates you op
Get rid

New posts on this thread. Refresh page