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Original poster

Can early dating survive 3 weeks between dates and a lost phone

30 replies

carditree · 23/12/2023 10:16

Had been dating for 4 weeks, weekly date, daily communication everything seemed positive, he got a opportunity to go abroad with a friend at less than 24 hours notice and went on the holiday and is coming home Boxing Day then will be travelling to his home town for Christmas... all fine

On his first day of his holiday his phone was stolen meaning we have had zero contact, it's felt strange as we have been i daily communication for the past 5 weeks and now time is getting on I'm feeling a little uneasy almost like he's probably just forgotten about me, nothing will be able to be sorted with the phone until he's home

So now I'm just sat here wondering what now, do I wait and see if he contacts me when he's phone is replaced and if he doesn't do I just leave it, should I reach out to him? Going through every possibility that maybe he might lose his contacts and won't have my number etc

OP posts:
Doggymummar · 23/12/2023 10:19

Do you seriously believe this? How did he tell you he had his phone stolen? Surely he uses whatever this was to CTC you when he gets back? I would have trouble believing this, or caring to be honest.

ComtesseDeSpair · 23/12/2023 10:43

It’s only relatively recently that anyone would expect somebody they’d met recently to be in touch regularly between dates or when they were on holiday, let alone r you no if an essential part of making the situation “work.” If it doesn’t work out l then what have you lost? A man who was a complete stranger to you a few weeks ago. Get on with whatever you would otherwise have been doing over Christmas and if he gets in touch again afterwards it’s a bonus.

Bobbotgegrinch · 23/12/2023 11:06

Eh?

You've only gone on a few dates, this isn't like you're in a relationship.

Just wait till you know he's home and give him a text, pick up where you've left off.

You've not had a chance to build anything yet, so not sure why you think it's going to fall apart.

ithinkicanithinkican · 23/12/2023 11:11

What method of communication did he use to let you know his phone had been stolen? Surely he can contact you that way, even if he doesn't have his phone contacts?

SamW98 · 23/12/2023 11:13

How did he contact you to tell you his phone was stolen?

Tbh it all sounds a bit far fetched to me. Manages to get away on holiday at less than 24 hours notice, phone stolen, nothing contact - call me cynical but it’s all a bit convenient.

Personally id just get on with my life and put him on back burner. If he wanted to be in touch, he would find a way. It’s a few dates you’ve not lost anything.

Bluela18 · 23/12/2023 11:17

I wouldn't seek him out at all and wait and see if you hear from him when he's supposed to be back. I'd put it to the back of your mind and try not think of him or expect any contact. If he's serious about you there will be ways to contact you again once he gets his new phone.

Catandsquirrel · 23/12/2023 11:20

Meh. I wouldn't write him off but I would forcibly put him on the mental back burner and if you haven't decided exclusivity maybe even look who else is out there. It's not that this definitely can't work and yes things are very new indeed. I just feel that its a bit convenient and he could use whatever method he used to let you know his phone was lost to check in occasionally. In dating keenness is what we want and if a man is very keen he would be able to find a way to drop you a photo now and again or something so as not to lose momentum. Don't hold on or think about him. Try to forget this for now.

Opentooffers · 23/12/2023 11:39

How long was the holiday and how long since you've heard from him? If he was keen to keep things up he would possibly have used whatever method he did to tell you he had lost his phone, to contact you again and give you his mate's number so he could borrow his mate's from time to time. I did similar once ( though not on holiday) and contacted him via my mate's Facebook, then used messenger until I got a new phone. There are ways round it, so if heard nothing for the whole holiday, I'd assume its just an excuse really, and perhaps hols last minute holiday mate is female ?

Groupofone · 23/12/2023 11:41

This suggests to me that he's married. He was able to text and meet with you whilst working but now it's the holidays it's too risky. So he can have a nice relaxing time with his family and pick back up with you in the New Year.

Call me cynical but I would be amazed if what he is telling you is the truth.

Straycatblue · 23/12/2023 22:32

Groupofone · 23/12/2023 11:41

This suggests to me that he's married. He was able to text and meet with you whilst working but now it's the holidays it's too risky. So he can have a nice relaxing time with his family and pick back up with you in the New Year.

Call me cynical but I would be amazed if what he is telling you is the truth.

This ^

Nasahoodie · 23/12/2023 22:37

Groupofone · 23/12/2023 11:41

This suggests to me that he's married. He was able to text and meet with you whilst working but now it's the holidays it's too risky. So he can have a nice relaxing time with his family and pick back up with you in the New Year.

Call me cynical but I would be amazed if what he is telling you is the truth.

I'm cynical as fuck, but I'm also suspicious of another woman somewhere.

Just out of interest, how did you find out his phone was stolen? If he can contact you that way why can't you continue to do so over Christmas?!

MBappse · 23/12/2023 22:44

Yep.... this is dodgy AF.
Step away.
Sorry OP

SamW98 · 23/12/2023 22:45

Nasahoodie · 23/12/2023 22:37

I'm cynical as fuck, but I'm also suspicious of another woman somewhere.

Just out of interest, how did you find out his phone was stolen? If he can contact you that way why can't you continue to do so over Christmas?!

Show quote history

The holiday abroad at less than 24 hours notice sounds rather suspect as well.

What's the chances he suddenly gets an offer of jumping on a plane today being away for the whole Christmas period and losing his phone on the first day? It’s like a catfish episode

determinedtomakethiswork · 23/12/2023 22:46

This man is not genuine. Please don't waste your time worrying about him.

Littlenutroast · 23/12/2023 22:47

Hmm a lost phone means you can’t contact him at all during the holiday which sounds convenient for him.

Tootingbec · 23/12/2023 22:56

Last minute holiday? Lost phone 🧐

I’m afraid he is married/in a relationship ☹️

uclpp · 23/12/2023 23:01

Hmmmmm

he might be married and the “trip” combined with “phone theft” would allow him to spend Christmas with his wife/kids uninterrupted by messages from you.

run a mile

yhk · 24/12/2023 01:10

This man is married, I'm afraid.

Sudden trip abroad over Christmas, lost phone on the first day?

More like he's off work and constantly around his wife.

El clásico.

EDIT: phone him from a withheld number. See if a) it rings at all and b) it has an international ringing tone.

solice84 · 24/12/2023 06:45

Get a friend to ring it and see what happens

Alicesmagicmushroom · 24/12/2023 06:57

100% married OP

anybloodyname · 24/12/2023 07:27

I agree - 100% married or in relationship

How very convenient ! Throw this one back , you deserve better 👌🏼

Woodenmouse87 · 24/12/2023 07:32

How did he tell you he'd lost his phone?

SparklyStone · 24/12/2023 08:04

It doesn’t sound real

GreenwichOrTwicks · 24/12/2023 08:08

solice84 · 24/12/2023 06:45

Get a friend to ring it and see what happens

This!!!

MiddleAgeAllTheRage · 24/12/2023 08:28

Is he on watsapp?

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