Deep admiration

[Inmyeyes1]

I had lately been feeling a deep admiration to a regular customer at the retail shop I work for. I recently came to know his email while collecting customers email which lead me check him out on his social media. His account is public, and each and every day I'm tempted to connect and contact or engage with him over there, but yet feels it's unethical as I came to know it during work. My admiration is burning inside me to a level that I literally become nervous and sweat whenever I see him. I had seen him for almost an year now. The thing is, I found a new job and will be leaving the current one soon. I don't know how to approach. I had completely ended contact with a guy who I had been meeting for at least 3 dates because I realized I don't have any intense emotions for him and that is one of the factors that made me realize that my admiration towards this first person was implied internally within me for a while.

It sounds like you have a crush that is getting in the way of other things.

Don't use his social media info you got from work- it's illegal and a very dodgy thing to do. You could get in a lot of trouble.

But DO ask him out when you see him! What's the worst that could happen?

I saw him even yesterday. I get too nervous and literally sweats. Will that be weird as I haven't talked to him apart from customer service? Also I don't know whether it's allowed to ask during my work time.

Well if youre leaving, it doesn't matter what is "allowed" in my mind.

I'd just tell him you've got a new job and if he's single and would like to go for a drink sometime, you'd be up for it. Then see what happens.

How does he behave with you OP? Do you think he may fancy you too? Just mention that you're leaving the job and would miss having him as a customer and that it's been a delight knowing him for the past year and see if he mentions anything about keeping in touch? You could also add where you're moving to next and perhaps suggest you'd like to be in touch?

He may show interest or he may not, you'll never know unless you ask!

How can you have deep admiration for someone you don't know and where you don't know anything about him?

I know what you mean but then I thought maybe she means she admired his looks or something!?

He gave his email to your company for services offered, by using it to track him down personally you've breached GDPR which is illegal and he would be quite within his rights to bee very cross and make a formal legal complaint to your company giving them problems, you disciplinary steps and an issue with your reference.
What you've done is totally unethical. You need to have a word with yourself and start behaving more respectfully towards his privacy.

This could be true love it an infatuation/limerence which is a very powerful emotion but not necessarily rooted in reality or capable of withstanding the test of time.

If you are holding it goes off s relationship you need to get a grip because given how invested you are you would be going in far too intense and it would be out of balance from the start, he could never match your feelings so it would struggle to develop organically.

Calm the fuck down before it blows up in your face. The way you're going will only cause yourself upset either through work or unrequited feelings, or embarrassment if you confess and he's baffled.

Then that would be shallow admiration!

You say you ended a guy you bad 3 dates with because you didn't have 'intense emotions' for him. At 3 dates in it would be fucking weird if you had had intense emotions for him!

Are you prone to infatuation?
Because look, this isn't really healthy.

You have no idea who this guy is and quite frankly, you're being creepy. If you were the guy and he was the girl, you'd be told to back the fuck off.

Now maybe I'm being somewhat unfair as who hasn't had...a celeb crush, for example. Which is what this seems like. Not even knowing someone and yet becoming a little obsessed with them.

And hell, some people I might encourage to just 'go for it'. But I'm not sure in your case op. You sound like you might be dealing with some other shit you need to handle.

Tread very, very carefully, and never let this man know you have stalked his social media. I would simply pass comment that you're leaving this job and you that you will miss it, and by inference, him.

You're being creepy. Imagine some guy that works in Tesco has secretly written down the email address connected to your Club Card and then every day he checks your social media accounts to see what you've been doing.

@27icey yup.
Not good.

What do you mean "deep admiration"?

I was waiting for you to say what he's done that you so admire.

But it seems like you just fancy him?

Calling it admiration doesn't make it any less creepy, if that's what you were going for.