Am I in the wrong?

[Anonymousmuma]

My cousin is going through a very hard time in her marriage amidst a terrible year - her dad dying in the most awful way and then her mother being sectioned... I said it might be a good idea for them to speak to a couples counsellor and recommend the one my partner and I use who is honestly amazing.

I told my partner and he is really cross and said I never consider his feelings and should have asked him first. He said he doesn't want my cousin (someone who he's had an hours conversation with' knowing about his personal life.

Am I in the wrong? I honestly never thought it would be an issue???

I can sort of see his point, while there is no shame in having counselling, it's a private matter and I guess not everyone wants it to be known by others.

Yes I think you were in the wrong. Many people might choose not to share that you attend counselling but you made that decision for him.

Ok thank you that's super helpful, I think I'm just very open about that kind of thing so if reversed it wouldn't bother me but it's really useful to hear alternative opinions!

I'm also really close with my family and just used to sharing everything, but will think before I do next time.

My husband wouldn't mind at all if I did something like this. I guess I kind of see where your husband is coming from, but u think he's being unreasonable (and self-involved. Your poor cousin sounds like she's had an awful time, so I'm not really sure your husband should consider himself the main character in this situation).

Sorry, that should say i think he's being unreasonable

That is personal information belonging to him and you shouldn't share it with someone without asking him.

I didn't share any details with her but suggested it during a phone conversation where she was in tears .. honestly I was just trying to help, our whole family is really worried about her.

I told my partner I had suggested it to her in the phone conversation - it wasn't pre planned but something I suggested because I know she's desperate..

I think he's being a bit precious to be honest. It's not like you discussed what was said in the therapy. You just recommended a therapist. Lots of people go to counselling for a massive variety of reasons. I think you did the right thing trying to help your cousin.