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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling a little sad

6 replies

matleavelove · 17/12/2023 18:35

Had a baby 7 months ago. I'm sure you know where this is going. Two consecutive nights out for a Christmas gathering that obviously take a monumental amount of effort to organise. First was with one friendship group that was ultimately cancelled due to multiple drop outs 24hrs before. I bore the brunt of financial consequences for that as I pre-booked train tickets and paid deposits, even though on SMP. No one even asked about any consequences when cancelling and I mentioned it after 2 dropped out but none of them reached out personally to sort out. Lesson learnt with them and won't do again. But then second friendship group outing today was another real letdown. 1 friend cancelled 7 mins before, another drove (not so much a problem in itself but was for drinks so instantly gave the impression of just 'showing their face') and left an hour and half later, whilst another then decided to catch a lift with them. One other friend pre-booked train for 3 hours after meet up time (we had a meal booked in to only just squeezed that in for them). It's over an hour one way commute for me and I got my partner to drop me off so that I could have a drink with them (I usually have to drive) and my partner had the little one for the day, using his last holiday day instead of working, which he does most Saturdays. I think they all thought they could be the one to skip out early and it wouldn't matter if others were there, except they all did... got the 'are you sure you're ok alone?' And I just said yes and enjoyed my cocktail watching young friendship groups having fun together. It's 2 trains for me home and with it being a Sunday and with strikes not at all regular. Ended up sat in a bar alone for nearly 2 hours after they'd all gone. Just got home and feeling a little deflated but perhaps also resentful. Not sure why I'm posting.

OP posts:
DGConsultant · 17/12/2023 18:43

That absolutely sucks! People are quite selfish sometimes. Talk through with partner probably, sounds like a good bloke.

Outliers · 17/12/2023 18:43

Kick your feet up, make some tea, enjoy a snack to a nice comedy.

Humans are unpredictable and unreliable. It's frustrating, but not something you'll care about in a week or two, so don't let it ruin your day now.

Gloriousgardener11 · 17/12/2023 18:49

So sorry your two friendships groups have let you down so badly.
You won’t feel the least bit guilty when another one is arranged and you just let them all down in a similar fashion.
Unfortunately people can be selfish twits.

matleavelove · 17/12/2023 19:44

Thanks for the replies guys! You're so right! At home with the little one and enjoying part of a Christmas film feeling much better! It's my season to enjoy time at home I guess! ☺️

OP posts:
matleavelove · 17/12/2023 19:45

And yes, the dad is a good one! A real good one!

OP posts:
EveryOtherNameTaken · 17/12/2023 20:27

Well now your know where your priorities lie! Next year give it a miss.

Glad you've enjoyed the rest of your evening OP.

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