Time to woman up and have a serious talk about his business. I've been there and it's bloody hard. Dh was self employed running his own business when we married, things were good until recession hit hard and the business started to struggle, it was a slow steady decline until the debts and stress was overwhelming, my income kept food on the table but My God it was a struggle, he just wouldn't give in, kept insisting he could trade his way out of trouble which meant he borrowed more, my money started paying small company bills and he was changing from the man I loved and married into someone else in front of me, almost ten years of struggling, I learnt to run a household on a shoestring, cheapest home cooked meals, heating on only when necessary, I'd go without to ensure I had enough money for dh to continue his hobby because I knew it was the only time his mind was occupied and he wasn't thinking about the business. Our health suffered, we couldn't afford health insurance (pretty essential here), our house needed maintenance we couldn't do, it goes on and on all due to a man who didn't want to admit his business failed, the facade had to be kept. I gave ultimatums, get a part time job, keep the business part time, shut the business or I'm leaving but I love him and stayed, our marriage was strong but it suffered, sex was non existent, the stress was choking us both but he just couldn't give up his dream of having his own business. We had to restructure our mortgage, nesrly lost our home, couldn't afford a night out, everything was just difficult. He'd come home in the evening and hardly speak, he'd spend hours in the shed tidying, to be honest he spoke to the dogs more than to me at that time. I really believed we were going to split and even then because my name was tied to the company I'd have been liable for some of the loans which I knew nothing about when they were taken out (lesson learnt, don't get involved unless you are going to be very involved and know everything that happens and have decision making power). Weirdly our saviour was Covid, all businesses closed, all repayments were paused, he had to stay at home and he started to relax which meant he could think clearly. He was then asked to design something related to his business that enabled other businesses to stay operating during covid so he did and we spent the first year busy with that which also meant some money coming in. Then he decided to start studying and that's how the rest of covid time was spent, he got a qualification in something completely unrelated to his past and got a job. Covid and the time it gave us saved us, we know how fortunate we were because it was such a terrible time for others. The business never reopened, we are paying the debts slowly but getting there, our marriage is good, strong and happy but we both know how close it came to finishing. Sorry for the novel but your posts just rang a bell in my memory and I fear for you and your mental health if you don't talk to your husband about how you are feeling and how it had an effect on what happened last night. Please don't do like I did and enable him for years while slowly drowning in the stress of it. We lost so many years and he lost so many employable career building years, we're in our mid 50's and the business starting having issues in our early 40's, don't be like us.