Help me stay strong/what would you do

[chocolateaddict231]

Hi all,

I need some strength from some impartial people, I'm far too close to the situation and I'm 'addicted' to the drama. My ex and I recently got back together and I regret it and now I would feel such remorse towards him to end it after saying I could get over the past. I got excited to see him again and have the closure of him apologising for the past but now I wish I had stayed strong. I've lost dignity/respect for myself and fear he probably has at being taken back too.

Some of our history includes....
-found him on dating apps. Said he was on them out of curiosity (I believe he didn't meet anyone as I looked at his apps but I think if someone had wanted to, he would). Got annoyed saying 'you're acting like I cheated'
-white lies to get out of any social gathering with my friends and family
-didn't include me in his life. He would get invited to weddings/birthdays etc and i was never mentioned as a plus one. I don't even think some friends knew about me.
-was crazy about a girl he worked with on Instagram. Used to ignore me watching her stories and liked every post.
-told me he had sex dreams about this girl at work and laughed about it.
-only told me he loved me when I would leave him or he was trying to make up for something.

I could go on but that's the gist of the worse. I feel pitiful writing all of that and now he's happy as we're back together but I have been an anxious mess. It being Christmas time makes me feel even worse about the situation xxx

Just break it off. You just say you tried but he's done too much damage to the relationship for it to work after all.

You're allowed to change your mind.

He might be upset but if he cared about you enough he wouldn't have done those things in the first place. He'll get over it. And so will you.

Get off the drama train for good.

How long was the split for? I'd be very dubious he can change in a short space of time, it's likely he's using you, when he starts to feel a bit bored again he'll be up to his usual antics. I think you should be very careful here as another huge heart break could be coming, do not tolerate another long list of his rubbish, bail out at the first sign of trouble or end it as you're already regretting it. Work on making yourself stronger not to accept it.

You. Don't. Owe. Him. Anything.

End it, right now.

End it.

Nothing good comes from getting back with people.

I would quite simply tell him you appreciate the effort but you're having a hard time trusting him again and for your well-being you can't see him anymore. You're just a caring person but it shouldn't be at the expense of your own mental health

He's a twat. End it.

That's too much to get over and for you it isn't working now anyway. It may be ok for him at the moment but his mask will slip again and behaviours will repeat.

It was a mistake to think he would change. Just do a quick clean break now. Have an adult conversation and go your separate ways before things get messy.

[I've taken someone back and it didn't work out. We both knew within the first few weeks and agreed to part again. It hurt [both of us] but was the only thing to do.]