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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Marriage is over

3 replies

Savedpassword · 02/12/2023 05:42

And I’m struggling. This is my second marriage, to a man who I truly believed to be the love of my life.
He is ND and we’ve navigated some really tricky times but ironically recently it seemed as if things were finally falling in to place in terms of being able to address and work through issues.

He and DC1 (21) have had a firey relationship recently. DC1 is a strong personality, can have some really emotional outbursts and has had PTSD after abuse from her biological dad.
DH finds DC difficult to deal with at times. They’ve had a few episodes where they’ve really ripped in to each other verbally.

DV has to live at home for at least the next 6-8 months for practical and logistical reasons.

Yesterday they had their worst row ever. Both said some really hurtful things. He’s packed his stuff and gone and my heart is broken. DC has some really important exams next week. Also has a history of suicide threats when emotions get out of control.

I have lost my husband and am terrified of losing my DC to suicide because of it. Don’t really know what I’m asking for but I don’t know what to do.

OP posts:
ProfessorPeppy · 02/12/2023 05:51

I think you need to support your daughter, her needs are greater and she’s still young. I don’t really understand why a grown man like your DH would be ‘rowing’ and saying hurtful things to your DD. He doesn’t sound like he’s contributing much to a happy, harmonious household.

I’d be relieved that he’d packed up and gone.

C1N1C · 02/12/2023 06:51

ProfessorPeppy · 02/12/2023 05:51

I think you need to support your daughter, her needs are greater and she’s still young. I don’t really understand why a grown man like your DH would be ‘rowing’ and saying hurtful things to your DD. He doesn’t sound like he’s contributing much to a happy, harmonious household.

I’d be relieved that he’d packed up and gone.

I see what you're saying, but I think we need to know what these hurtful things are before we judge. Truth can be hurtful. It might also be necessary.

DustyLee123 · 02/12/2023 06:56

Put your DD first.

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