Left today

[Gemaski]

Today I have left, with my two children.

Years we have been unhappy, he has cheated on multiple occasions comes and goes as he pleases. I feel scared in my own home even though he has only hit me once. Its more the shouting that scares me, the constant belittling

I said I was leaving this morning before he went to work and I have actually done it. I dont think he believed me when I said it.I'm at my parents with my children and they (11 and 9) are happy with my decision. I know it is the right thing but why am I plagued with guilt it's near christmas/his birthday/ I left and there is no food in the fridge.

I'm scared for tonight when he realises I meant it. Please can I have moral support x

Just wanted to say best of luck to you. Your kids are lucky to have a strong Mum like you and I'm so glad you have lovely parents helping you x

Hi, you feel guilty because he’s done a right number on you! Time now for him not to be your focus, time now to focus on your own healing and having some peace in you and your children’s lives. Thank goodness you have the support of parents. His birthday, the state of his fridge, him, …..not your worry or concern in the slightest now. You’ve left, you’ve done it for reasons, don’t doubt yourself and above all don’t look back. Good luck.

This was me 2 years ago. I lived with parents for almost a year. I don't regret a moment. Be proud of you today. You did it. You made a choice that will benefit you and your DC. I now have my own home. My child is doing brilliant.
If you want to talk about it please DM me. Us girls/women are each other's best support.
Each day you will feel stronger and, like me 2 years from now, you will be amazed how strong you have been xx

Little update. He messaged that evening demanding to see 3 years bank statements as he is convinced I've been keeping money to the side- bearing in mind he paid very little towards house and bills as the higher earner. I have refused as only want to plan for the future.
Had no more communication with him Except that he phoned the children on Friday asking them when he would see them on Saturday I messaged and said I will bring them up for a few hours today, which I have.

They sat and watched netflix together which was nice as usually on a Sunday he would either be sleeping off the night before or not come home, whilst I packed a few more bits. We didn't speak but I heard him ask my son how long we are staying at nannies for dont think he realises it is permanent.

I'm feeling numb, I should be happy but feel guilt. Just want these next few weeks over as just want to cry but keep on plastering on a fake smile for the kids. My daughter is happy my son is sad as he misses his room.
Will phone him one day this week to make plans for my sons birthday next Sunday but not sure what next. It all feels a mess and I need to keep reminding myself why I left.

Hey first of all weld9ne and unfortunately the guilt will stick even beyond recovery.

One thing you need to nip in the butt right away is him asking the children the adult questions. I know they're happy with your decision BUT they don't deserve to be the middle man and may resent for it. You have to have a level of communication with him for matters that concern the kids / ending the relationship ( whatever needs settled ect )