Calls every day?

[Fassbender2020]

I'm doing some work on myself and my own boundaries and just wanted to sense check myself

Are multiple calls a day normal in a friendship and would you be OK with your dp or dh doing that with a female friend? Or if not multiple calls, talking to them every day in some way?

This is crazy. I've got real friends, both sexes, who I've known for years. None of them call me multiple times a day and vice versa.

So they are 'together' now?

Did you post about this before OP? Before he left? I’m so sorry it turned out like this.

I did yes. How he took her out on her birthday and didn't tell me.

Even though it's over it still effected me seeing it in black and white. She doesn't say they did anything and the conversation after that isn't sexual but wtf would you react like that physically to her just hugging him unless he was just desperate to be with her.

I don't even speak to my DH every day as we work away. I can't imagine several calls to a friend

The calls per day are surely a red herring?

He's living with her now. You have your answer.

However, on the original question, it depends how old you are. In my 20s I would spend hours on the phone every day to various close friends, all of which were nothing more than friends (both male and female). In my late 40s, not so much. We're all at different life-stages and my closest friends are now busy with family life etc.

There are still weeks though were if one or other is having problems we might have multiple calls or texts per day. That in itself doesn't make it sexual. The content of the calls or messages and the fact he's now living with her on the other hand, would.

Yes, I was just curious if that was normal to anyone else and how I felt about it at the time

Also, how long were they 'friends'?

I find it odd even in a long term relationship! My dp regularly travels overseas, he calls me daily, unless he's actually got something urgent to say in which case he'll what's app - I think it's a sign of insecurity to need constant contact - perhaps I'm showing my age remembering when calls were expensive

They were friends for a few years, met just after our child was born. Being able to read messages has just lit a fuse again. I can't believe he saw nothing wrong with wearing clothes she bought him and not see what an intimate gesture that is. I know I'm ranting now but I've just read more, he didn't tell me she'd bought him half the stuff she had. That's not normal for friends is it, even without having sex?

Far more likely he knew perfectly well it was wrong and just gaslighted the shit out of you.

You know that he was lying throughout and this was an affair, yes? Or are you still trying to believe his story?

I believe he believes it but that part doesn't really matter as its happened now. I just keep going over things in my head and questioning things

Pressed send too soon. I was saying that I think anyone would find that an intimate thing