Trying to move on

[3sausagedogs]

I have accepted my boyfriend has ended it, he ghosted me and when I turned up to get my stuff he was awful to me. I just saw him smiling on a gym advert on Instagram and I’m really upset! It was a random advert, I don’t follow his gym and I blocked him! I just feel shit! I’ve blocked him so he won’t see me on anything and miss me. I’ve had a nice weekend etc and I’ve kept busy but I feel really upset now I’ve seen him! I’ve been really brave up until now. It just feels awful just before Xmas and I’ve been dumped. When will it stop feeling so rubbish?

Well done for blocking, it's the first step and does really accelerate the process. You're doing the right things keeping yourself busy.

Sometimes when I've been struggling to move on, I've looked internally at why and trying to understand if it was really them I loved and wanted to be with or if it was the ego shattering of being rejected that I was dwelling in that was stopping me moving forward.... and then trying to reframe that to do I really want to be with someone who could treat you that way? NO, so why I am devaluing myself by giving them so much emotional energy.

It's so much harder in reality, I know. But someone who could treat you awfully when you went to get your stuff, aswell as ghosting you - IS NOT someone you want to be with, no one should be treated like that in a happy healthy relationship.

You will get past it. Time, No Contact, Self Worth and opening yourself up to new people.

Hang in there. It will be crap for a couple of months then just as spring is on the way you’ll be feeling a lot better. Try and stay off looking at him on social media. It’s so so hard and I’m guilty of this too, which is why I know how much it can set you back emotionally. Only contact him when you’ve fully accepted that the relationship is over, because you’re incompatible, have completely moved on, you want to hear from him and are sure he’d like to hear from you . All these things. This will probably never happen

I blocked him on social media and on my phone. It was just bad luck that when I went on instagram he was on an advert for his gym! I don’t even follow his gym!! It’s just we live really close to each other so it’s a local gym to me 😞 I blocked him so I didn’t see him! He looked fine working out like he’s totally fine. It just feels rubbish! I know I have to keep going but it feels awful