I posted on a I b u earlier and got slaughtered. Hoping to get better responses on here.
Partners been out of work 2 months. He's due surgery and is in extreme pain.. he has been in severe pain all year and its not stopped him wanting sex 3 or 4 times a week.
He has a history in previous relationships and in the first year of our relationship messaging other women. No idea why he did it. He lost his partner before me to it. He deleted social media 2 years back and it's help solve the issue. No issues since.
Anyway I'm not paranoid I've always been right in the past. When we were dating (not officially together but declared major feelings) he fell out with me for 6 weeks and was meeting up with someone from tinder!
Since August there's been a few weeks good and then a few weeks bad. Felt old habits may have been returning. His phone number was used to set up an instagram account and I got a notification. When I looked he was following 2 local women. He denied it was him and eventually I had to trust him.he had no instagram app on his phone and I had no proof. He claimed he'd never heard of either of them. 6 weeks later I saw he'd sent money to the older woman who looked around 60. He said he bought something from her son but didn't know her. He does know her son it turned out.
Anyway 2 weeks ago he kept going on his phone and his leg was tapping. He was over explaining checking his football scores and it looked obvious to me he was typing! That anxious feeling returned. When he was asleep I checked his phone. There were 12 pictures of a woman on there from his exes family. Even her heels! I don't think this woman is aware he's saved these from her fb. Anyway we had abit of a row over that. I told him if he wanted to look at other women he should be ending it. He wriggled out of it and me too exhausted to argue let it go.
A week later his phone was hidden when we went to bed. I heard it buzz in the wash basket! Why was he hiding it? This time when I looked a dating site was open. It started loading. He's made a profile with no pictures and a fake name but said the truth about location. I ended it amd left. A week later he begged me to believe him. Said it was a hacked email etc. I knew it wasn't true but I've been trying to reconnect with him.
I was away this weekend. I was going down his after I got back. At around 2pm he text saying I shouldn't go down as I'd be exhausted after my day out. He was right. But around 6pm he disappeared. He often falls asleep early since loosing his job. He didn't open my message until the next morning. Said he'd just got up. He had looked after my dog and said both dogs were up from 2am and he was shattered and been on sofa since 2am!
I went down and he randomly had a bath straight away. Whilst in the bath I saw one long blonde hair on his sofa. He said it must have come in on his clothes or my coat or the dogs. He then said loads of people keep talking to him about I'm a celebrity and asked Mr if I like it. When I asked him who as he's been in the flat and not spoke to anyone for weeks he had no names. I asked him if he'd had anyone in the flat
Today I came out with it..told him i had this awful feeling he was cheating or at least messaging someone. He has gone silent on me and accused me of constantly starting on him.
I was told on aibu I was abusive and sounded a nightmare.
I need more opinions