Horrible Dynamic

[Rainbow821]

My DM has cut me and my two DS off for silly reasons that she’s made up. I’m tired of trying to prove my innocence so I’m walking away from this unhealthy dynamic as it’s a regular occurrence. She’s been emotionally abusing me for a long time.

My main concern is my two DS 5 & 4, had a close relationship with her, and have since asked why grandma doesn’t visit or call anymore? I’m struggling to try and explain why. Ive said grandma may be moving away but realistically we could end up seeing her locally. I can’t think of what else to say, and how to manage them seeing her in public when she’s rejected them.

She laughed in my face when I said it’s a shame she’s willing to lose her grandsons.

I think it's best not to lie to your kids, even if you want to spare them the pain of losing their grandma.
If you lie, they might end up resenting you for being dishonest.

Try to use non complicated words to explain what went on, but without putting any blame or pressure on your children. Also, if at all possible, try not to paint your mother as the villain and be as neutral as possible.

When my 4-year old asked me why I don't have a dad, I calmly explained that my father and I argued so much that it made us both sad. So in order for us not to be sad anymore, we were taking some time away from each other. Answer any questions they may have and comfort them if you need to.