So myself and my partner have been seeing one another and seriously so since earlier this year, he is currently just divorced which is what we were waiting on, all papers done etc and he is just selling his house too with the ex. His ex is moving over my way moving into her new partner's house and they have a son together who is 13 who will also be moving in with her and staying with my partner 2/3 times in the week seeing every other weekend too.
During this process my partner was renting a flat and will now need to move over my way for his son's school in the next few months, well in December really.
I felt he was really rushing me to move in with me, I have a 4 bed house, which I felt kind of stressful about as I wasnt ready and needed to see him having his own place over here first of all and seeing his son more as only really been around him a few months and its so so soon too.
I was not in a rush, he knew too it would help me financially and him also, because really he doesnt want to find his own place to move into or rent again and he knew he would love to live in my place but something with him didnt feel right, I felt it was too soon... he was also leaving a lot of things at my house too, including washing which he kept adding into the basket and also pretty much all his clothes/bikes which I have asked him to now move out.
He is getting money from his ex as confirmed in the divorce papers from the sale of the house too. This issue about getting divorced, his living situation being too soon and his son potentially would be moving in with myself 2/3 times in the week was a little too much for me, I said I need to get to know him, because when you see him in the week he cant stay over yet, this isnt fair on myself...he would just assume it would be....he would drop hits saying lets pick up D and is it ok he stays over?
He also has debts to pay off, a car to sell he owes 20k on and I was just not feeling secure until he sorted a few things out etc. So we agreed to get this sorted, for him to do all this, then look at moving in together later etc which seemed sensible.
Now, my dear friend has been on Bumble a few years now and said to me, Charlie I have just seen your boyfriend on there, here is a screenshot, are you still together? hope you dont mind me telling you but wanted you to know!
Shocked wasnt the word, when I confronted him he said, well yes its true, I had the app but I wasnt active on it or using it. (I still dont believe him)
When we were together and made ourselves official we deleted those apps together and our profiles etc, now she mentioned to me that he would need to have been active recently to have been shown on the reel etc and he has only just come on there. So this to me makes me think he has been active.She has been on there for about 2 - 3 years. We have not been getting on and I have wanted some time alone due to all the stress with him and his divorce and moving, its just how things have been but it looks to me like he has been seeing what else is out there per say!
He turned up unexpectedly at my house on Tuesday night crying, trying to explain himself, to which I turned him away, he is texting telling me he is sorry, cant sleep, injured himself whilst running, sends copies of his divorce papers through and tells me that well I am sure there was something going on with other men whilst I am at my running club, WTF? lets turn this around on me, which made me really angry!!
I have told him now its over, he is in denial about using the site, but lately in the last 2 weeks, he has met up with his so called long distance friend James, which he has never done before, I do believe he has met up with women, thats my gut instinct as this doesnt seem his behaviour.
So after all this kind of hoping things would work out, for me, its a case of I was getting more and more stressed and maybe I needed to see this or hear this in order to finally let him go, even though he is in complete denial saying he didnt delete his app but then turns it on me, then starts crying, and on it goes. He was always crying by the way, I just felt drained!
Thank you for reading, just still feeling a little urgh with it all.....has anyone experienced their exes on dating apps/partners?