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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Mum being unfair with Grandchildren

26 replies

HollyBerri · 31/10/2023 08:06

Hi. Am not sure where to post this but i am so pissed off with my mum (and sister) right now.
For context i have 2 siblings and growing up mum was horrible to me a lot of the time. We do get along okay now though. We both make an effort. My dc love her.
She has always really favoured 1 sister in particular and its gone over to our children which is so hurtful. All siblings have dc but me & dsis have children the same age who are very close - best friends as well as cousins.
i am positive mum has in the last 12 months has bough my sisters child 2 very expensive items and then both dsis & mum have lied about it whilst my dc has had nothing. Its hard to say what exactly without being very outing but both times it was something my dc wanted aswell & we had to save for & bought budget versions.
its so bloody hurtful and its the lies aswell. On both occasions it was really obvious because of the convoluted stories about where the money came from when clearly it was from Gran. On this occasion its so obvious- they both rushed to tell us (separately) about how they had managed to obtain this bargain 1 off item at a fraction of what it should have cost etc. Both dh and I have said to each other its bullshit - my mum had bought it.
i don’t want to fall out as life’s to short but how to I handle it? I could easily quiz both of them and catch out them by picking at the holes in the story but for what reason? Its just so hurtful - am sure dc can see it to. The last time both my older dc said to me privately its obvious who really bought the items.
I usually stay out of there way as Im so annoyed but its harder with Christmas (and a big family birthday) coming up. I want to tell them to cut the bullshit but i know it will cause an argument as both will deny & be very defensive.

OP posts:
Crikeyalmighty · 31/10/2023 11:49

@HollyBerri I am so sorry- that's very hurtful and twatty behaviour . My 25 year old sons grandad is amazing to him- pays to sort his car, helps him out with cash when needed as he has plenty-my son adores his grandad - he hasn't got to that stage with his granddaughter yet (my husbands niece) as she's only 13 but I know he would be totally the same if he lives long enough (he's 84 now)

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