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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

So excited, finally told him to go

8 replies

Scrambledchickens · 28/10/2023 08:38

Have been unhappy for years, been trying to stay together for the kids.
Ex works but drinks too much prefers the pub to home, am suspicious of drug use too.
I finally told him enough is enough and he needs to move out, not married thankfully.
have told the kids 16,13,11 who have all taken it really well ( that was my biggest worry)
he has a flat that becomes free next week.
He is now moping around, crying that he is back to where he was 30 yrs ago.
All he is worried about is money, he never has any despite a well paid job, always in debt.
I am really suspicious he was just cocklodging all this time.
I am so happy and relieved that this is now happening, I feel so free, I will manage and can increase my working hours if I need to.
I know there are lots of parents doing the same thing and I just wanted to offer a glimmer of hope if you are waiting for the right time that it will come.

OP posts:
happinessischocolate · 28/10/2023 08:41

Well done, best thing I ever did, kicking my ex out.

You'll find life so much easier, especially as the kids are taking it well and are older.

MrsPerfect12 · 28/10/2023 08:42

Well done! A new life is coming ☀️

NorthernSturdyGirl · 28/10/2023 08:43

Well Done! You have taken back control and can see hope. Stand firm as he hasn't gone yet. We all know he isn't back where he started, he has wonderful kids, and what he does with this is his responsibility not yours. I wish you all the best, big hugs!

mycatsanutter · 28/10/2023 08:49

Well done ! You will feel so free when he has gone , I still remember that elated feeling 20 years on !

Ostryga · 28/10/2023 09:10

Well done! You are all going to flourish without the drunk weight around your neck.

Don’t let his pity party affect you, he has done this all to himself and can suffer the consequences.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 28/10/2023 12:57

It's almost 12 years since I booted a cocklodger out. Best thing I ever did. Felt instantly calmer. The stress of never knowing what he was going to do next to bankrupt us was horrendous. Getting rid of that stress alone was life changing. I've never looked back.

Congratulations for getting your life back. Ignore his crocodile tears and protestations. Enjoy the next adventure!

Scrambledchickens · 28/10/2023 21:30

Thank you all, I know there will be wobbly moments but my mind is set, no looking back !

OP posts:
PinkGaspardJumper · 28/10/2023 21:31

Me too!!

Good riddance to bad rubbish!!

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