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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

DP telling his kids about me this evening

31 replies

Blushingm · 18/10/2023 21:05

And I'm on pins - I just can't concentrate on anything.

His divorce was quite acrimonious - he moved out of the marital home 2 years ago to a rented flat but has owned his new house about a year now. We've been together about 18 months.

His kids found it difficult having their parents split up and him move out. They were 9 & 12 at the time. He has them 6 out of 14 nights a fortnight and they're very close.

I'm really worrying about what their reaction is going to be. I'm afraid they're going to be unhappy in which case I know DP will find it really hard maybe impossible to keep seeing me - which I do completely understand, his DC should be his main priority

OP posts:

Original poster

Blushingm · 20/10/2023 09:51

@amylou8 I've got a step mother too - she's wonderful and her and my dad love eachother so much - she's probably the best thing that's ever happened to him - he's so happy. They've been together about 25 years now, I was about 19 when they got together.

At 10 how did you feel? Had your parents been separated long? Had your mum been with your step dad long?

My worry is that they've gone from parents together, then not and then someone new so it's a big change for them plus being the age they are emotions are all over the place anyway

OP posts:

Original poster

Blushingm · 20/10/2023 09:51

@TheLongpigs that means a lot - we are just trying to get things right so thank you

OP posts:

letstrythatagain · 21/10/2023 20:23

Jonti23 · 20/10/2023 06:49

Readung your undated post it strikes me that you have some glee and vested interest into. wanting daddy to make a commitment of not going back so this is quite an event for yiu and not so much about what the kids are feeling. It’s different if they are meeting u in person but this puts a dagger straight into their little hearts.

🤣🤣 fair play this is the biggest load of rubbish I've seen on Mumsnet for a while and that's saying something. OP ignore!

Original poster

Blushingm · 22/10/2023 09:03

@letstrythatagain I will!!!! 😂

OP posts:

Gloriously · 22/10/2023 09:13

What’s your next steps?

Are you planning on living together soon?

Is the expectation that you will be in their lives all the time that they are with their DF?

Do you have DC to blend? Or are you planning more DC together?

Has their DM dated?

Original poster

Blushingm · 22/10/2023 19:22

We do plan on living together but not til his DC go off to uni - we'll both sell and hopefully buy together mortgage free

I have 2 DC myself but they're a bit older than his at 17 & 21. Definitely no more DC for either of us - we are both past that!

I definitely don't intend to be there all the time - we both know that's not the plan - it will be good to spend sometime all together eventually but nothing planned as yet - it all depends if they even want to meet me

DP doesn't think his EW has dated. She's never said anything

OP posts:

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