I can't work out whether I'm just being incredibly paranoid, or whether my husband is showing all the signs of having an affair.
I'll preface this by saying he has always been very vocal about people who cheat, and until I few months ago, I honestly would not have even considered it as a possibility.
So a few months ago I unlocked his iPhone because he asked me to take a photo (I didn't have my phone handy). It opened immediately to WhatsApp, and it asked for Face ID. Obviously I swiped out of it and took the photo, but afterwards I asked him why he'd locked WhatsApp.
He just shrugged and said he hadn't realised he'd done it.... yet it's still locked several months later.
He's clearly forgotten but I added my face to his Face ID a month or so before, and told him I was going to do it. I was wearing sunglasses at the time, so it wouldn't have opened.
He regularly doesn't save numbers to his contacts, so his WhatsApp is full of work contacts messaging him (despite him having a work phone and carrying it constantly) with no names on them.
I haven't yet gone through his WhatsApp - but it's something I'm thinking of doing because of everything else.
We've always known each other's phone code, and obviously I can get into WhatsApp with the passcode anyway - but I wonder if he's locked it so that the messages don't show up on his phone's lock screen.
Then he started at a new gym about 6 months ago. Recently he's been going to the gym for a 6pm class. He leaves 45 minutes before, for a class that is a 15 minute drive (I don't know what the parking is like). Then he doesn't get back until 45 minutes after the class.
He says that the class never starts on time, but this has been going on for weeks! There are classes before and after so I'm sure if they were late all the time there would be complaints. I've checked the schedule and the classes are listed to start when he says they are.
He's been having a stressful time at work - and then suddenly in July he decided on a Tuesday, that he needed to get away and so took himself off to a fitness retreat in another country, about a 3 hour flight away. He stayed two nights and then came back. It was very last minute and it was a bit out of character.
He has had to travel for work a lot since September. Initially he was away for two weeks and was sending photo messages to the kids iPads for those two weeks, plus texting me occasionally.
We don't text or call a lot when he's away, we never have, in over 20 years of being together. He's not a big phone talker and I am not a fan of lengthy text conversations. So that's not unusual.
He was away over the weekend of the 2 weeks as it was too far to come home and then go back again, and we got a few photos of him at the pool etc.
We don't live in the UK at the moment, but have a house there. Which we are currently clearing so we can rent it out. I was due to go to the UK to sort out the removals etc, but it had to be cancelled last minute as the tenants needed to delay.
The next week he was off to London and then on to Italy. So I suggested that he could go to the house at the weekend and the removals could come in then. He was not pleased at the suggestion.
He then said he had to go to Italy on the Thursday, and then all the following week, so he wouldn't be in the UK at the weekend. This was news to me and felt a little like a convenient excuse.
A day later he says he can fly into London early, and go to the house before he's due in London - which didn't make any sense. Things got pushed back again so it never became an issue.
His dad lives in Italy, alone and he is pretty old now. His health and mobility is deteriorating and all the family live in the UK. We've been talking about him going over for a weekend to see him and assess the situation.
So I asked him if he'd pop in to see his dad for the weekend while he's in country. It would be easy to do, based on where he was supposed to be. He pulled a face and just said he didn't think he'd be able to.....
Once he's in London (confirmed by photos he sent to the family chat) he then says that he's not sure he's going to Italy on the Thursday, might have to go elsewhere, and the meeting hasn't been confirmed.
Then, and only when I asked, he tells me he's in France. Apparently an unexpected meeting came up so he went. But he doesn't say Paris - he says France.
The whole thing just doesn't sit right. No photos were sent to the family chat over the weekend, despite him not working and being in a major city, which would usually spark a lot of photos.
All our photos upload automatically to the cloud, and I had a peek this morning, the photographs stop on Thursday and restart on Monday when he got to Rome.
Also, I asked his PA to send me his flight details when he is due to travel (as he's often told me the dates, but not included the travel time, which is often a day either side because of how far he travels - and it's mucked up our plans).
I have her number legitimately because we are often in contact about documents etc that need to be sent to the house/office while he is away.
She mentioned it to him and he was not impressed. Said I shouldn't bother her, and he would send me the dates, even when I pointed out he'd not sent me the full details the last couple of times.
Obviously sex is very limited given he's barely been here but it's been months since he's instigated it, and he often takes himself off to bed early as he gets up really early for work - so we barely see each other.
I feel like I should be starting to worry, something just feels off. Am I wrong?
Honesty please! Even if it's not good news, I'd rather get opinions from someone who doesn't know us.