Broken up on holiday

[Brokenandstuck]

I’ve had a huge row with my partner of 8 years, things have been rocky for a while but the last few months have been much better I thought we where finally through the rough patch.
We have come away for the week and had a huge argument I think this is probably the end. He has said he doesn’t want to live like this anymore and gone out. I am in our tiny cabin trying to talk myself out of jumping off the cliff top. We are 5 hours from home, not in the uk so theirs no public transport, taxi service etc. I don’t know what to do I’m completely trapped here. I can’t even think rationally what to do in this situation

That's tough op.

I'm sorry for you.

Ok on a practical level, are you safe?

When are you booked until?
What are travel arrangements?

Then when home, start a list.

Do you live together? What arrangements do you need to make.

8 years is a long time. Is there space to talk and agree things then head home?

Do you have dc together?

Has he gone and left you there or will he come back?

Lots of questions but just trying to focus you on the here and now.

I am safe, it’s a safe place but I have no way of leaving. I’m assuming he’s coming back. I’d like to think despite this he isn’t enough of a dick to leave me stranded here with no food and limited water.
No children but after 8 years a lot of baggage, a shared tenancy and I have no legal right to remain in this country without his support so my entire life is out the window. My parents will probably take me in but it will be starting from scratch. I think this is almost what scares me more than loosing him. That not only will he be gone but so will my job, house, friends and dogs.

Hi @Brokenandstuck
Take a deep breath hun, it's going to be ok. Is there somewhere in the town centre you could go, get some tea / coffee, lunch x

@carddino unfortunately not, the nearest town is 15km away. I’m in a cabin in the middle of nowhere, we booked it because theirs literally nothing around just walking trails. That is obviously backfiring a little now

Can you access local social media eg fb and ask for some help? Surely someone local will come and assist you?

How long can you comfortably stay in the cabin? If it's till tomorrow I'd suggest you wait if he returns. If he doesn't you can walk to the next town tomorrow and travel back from there. Do you have access to money?

If you have enough food water I'd stay and wait for his return so don't panic just yet
Can you walk to the nearest public transport? This may run from the town?
Is there a customer service line for the company/ persons you booked through?
I think they would be able to advise you

I will be fine here until tomorrow, no dinner won’t kill me and I have snacks.
I just can’t believe this has happened and 8 years is gone, done, wasted just like that

I'm sorry
If he was having doubts, the kinder thing would be to have told you before you left
I'll be thinking of you

What country are you in? Talking of cabins and trails, I'm wondering if you are in the same country as me. Maybe I can help you looking at the right to stay etc.

Well she is on mumsnet. 😊

The other option is to pack up and go somewhere else, a nice city or resort not too far?

Stay at a nice hotel if £££, or a nice hostel if less £? Eat out, visit some places? Even staying in a nice hotel for a couple of nights could be very therapeutic if you can afford it.

you dont really love him because he is the link to keeping you in the country! sounds more like you are using him!!!

Rubbish. If you say you wouldn't be considering this as part of the outcome of a bad break up, knowing that your entire life will be turned upside down by it, then you're a liar.

Honestly cannot fathom those who see a distressed poster going through a really tough time and they charge on and say crap like this 🙄

Has he come back @Brokenandstuck or have you heard from him?

I'm amazed that a cabin in the middle of nowhere has Internet. I don't get a signal half a mile onto Dartmoor

Just read this "I have no legal right to remain in this country without his support so my entire life is out the window" Does that sound like love to you???

Honestly, what’re you bringing to this conversation? Maybe you don’t have much experience of complex thoughts emotions but it is perfectly possible to love someone and be heartbroken at the potential loss of your relationship with them as well as being daunted and sad at the change of life that would entail.

Thankyou for all the kind messages, I am just going to ignore the less kind ones. He came back and we did a lot of talking. I am still conflicted but we do both love each other and he is not a bad man we are just not seeing eye to eye on certain topics and seem constantly at a logger heads. He has said he will consider couples therapy so perhaps that is the answer.

At the same time I'd start making practical plans for a break up - putting aside some savings etc. Having this information can make us feel more in control and perhaps you won't feel so reliant on him. Good luck. Hope things work out for the best.

@BethDuttonsTwin I think that is good advice, I want this to work but also it has highlighted how vulnerable I am without him so I need to work on that.