Relationship

[L786]

Hi I just need someone to talk to I don’t have any friends I only have 1 sister she is the best but I find it hard to open up. I lost my mum in April so I’m still struggling. I have been with my husband since 2012 got married 2014 when I was 17 and he was 21 I’ve always been really mature for my age with everything I’ve been through in life I have 3 kids. We got married as I fell pregnant I did love him but tbh he wasn’t the nicest person no romance he didn’t make me feel special. Fast forward I stayed for our kids and maybe the thought of being alone scared me but I’ve just had enough I can’t do it anymore I think with losing my mum unexpectedly she was only 49 has a lot to do with it. He did not help at all with the kids or the cleaning or cooking was doing it all myself so have felt like a single mum from the start but I don’t know why I’m struggling and I think I should just take him back but I keep telling myself I’m too good for him he doesn't deserve me he’s never appreciated me. I think I’m just looking for someone to tell me I’ve done the right thing

Do not take him back, you have done the right thing in leaving him. You were not put on this earth to be his skivvy and besides which he never appreciated you either.

Would you want your kids to have been in a marriage like yours?. No you would not and you would want better for them. Keep rebuilding your life and finding out who you are.

As I said previously I think you've done the right thing, you shouldn't have to live like that and it likely would get more difficult over time and your children would be stuck in it too.

Was this relationship the first and longest you have had, considering the age you settled?

Relationships shouldn't be like that, you should both care and love one another with everything being equal. In some it's not equal and you bear the weight of everything without any sign of affection or care.

You say you don't have any friends, is that by choice or personality or has your situation isolated you in a sense?

Also, sorry for your loss, must be hard but like with your relationship things will ease with time.

thanks for replying, yes he’s the only guy I have been with I’m 26 now and my kids are 2,4 and 8. I never got the chance to make friends as I never did anything for myself he never looked after our kids for me to get the chance to go out. I have been depressed I think for a long time and just realised recently

Thanks for replying, you are right I’ve always told myself I wouldn’t want my daughters to live a life like mine he’s got a different mentality thinks I should do everything for him as that’s my duty

Have you spoken to the GP and had any counselling ?
Im sorry your mum died so young, mine was a similar age 💐

@DustyLee123 thank you and yes I went to gp they gave me antidepressants I took it for 2 weeks and had to come off them as i was struggling to wake up during night my middle child(4) has some health issues

It may not seem like it now but things will get better. I've not long come out of abusive marriage and I fell into a hole but I'm currently fighting for my children and although that's not sorted things are better than there were mental health wise.

You've got time on your side too, you settled down young like I did although I was early twenties and I'm bit older than you. With time things will get better and you'll find someone who treats you well and you'll see how different and good things can be with the right person.