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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How to get over fear of cheating from manipulative ex?

5 replies

ThisIsHardToPick · 13/10/2023 15:36

My ex was very manipulative and emotionally controlling.

He managed to talk his way out of his strange behaviour through love bombing and guilt trips and when I was with him I lost all sense of judgement on what was suspicious. I felt lost and crazy.

Early on in our relationship he showed me a video on his phone (after purposely turning the phone away from me, switching on his WiFi- his excuse for having it off was to save battery, to me it was weird but I accepted it as we all have quirks, and then doing a few swipes) as we were watching a WhatsApp message popped up with a girls name but before I had chance to read anything he quickly jumped up and panicked saying 'oh we don't want that' I instantly knew it was dodgy but didn't know how to react, so went to the toilet to compose myself before confronting him. When I came back he'd deleted the message and gave me a story of how it was someone from work and Confidential so that's why. Then he followed it with the emotional BS and tears. I was confused and in hindsight I know I should have ended it then as I knew.
The problem was I didn't want to do anything without hard evidence just incase it was true and I ended it for no reason.

This then lead to me always being suspicious and there was plenty of strange behaviour from him, but never nothing 100% concrete to pin cheating on him.

Eventually I found out he lied about having Facebook (I never told him I didn't want him to have it etc) so I added him- again I got the 'oh I only got it back last week bla bla' and then from there found out he also had snapchat- something else he flat out lied about having. This was also new and for work apparently. He was confident snap chat wouldn't out him, as conversations disappear, so he proudly offered to prove me wrong, but thankfully for me somehow a conversation was there. Then clicking on contacts brought up several conversations one mentioned a dating site they met on. Obviously at this point it was a Huge sense of relief for me as I finally got my proof and knew I wasn't crazy and left him.

However the after effects are still with me a year on. Im completely over him personally but I still feel I wouldn't feel comfortable taking someone at their word and giving them the benefit of the doubt.

It hit me the other day when I had a text from someone who got the wrong number asking how I was and we should meet up. Obviously I dismissed it as I hadn't given anyone my number but I thought what if I had a partner and he got that text? How could I feel comfortable giving him the benefit of the doubt knowing my ex completely abused that? But from experience I also know it could be 100% innocent, so wouldn't want to end a relationship on just that but I'd feel like I was back there in that situation.

If I was in a relationship in the future with someone and they get a 'hey how are you?' text but say it must be a wrong number, they get a call off an unknown number, they say they are meeting a friend or working late etc is it safe to give them the benefit of the doubt if nothing else about them or their behaviour strikes you as strange?

With my ex there was a lot of strange behaviour and excuses but I gave him the benefit of the doubt as I was so confused and couldn't trust my own judgement. Now I think im over compensating and would be suspicious over the smallest thing and I don't want to inflict paranoia onto someone who has done nothing wrong, but I don't want to be mug and fall for anything again.

Has anyone been through similar or got any tips on how to trust your judgement and be aware and sensible without being paranoid and reacting to things unnecessarily?

OP posts:
Barrowgirl · 13/10/2023 15:55

What is your father like? Your brother? Any male close friends?

once you realise that not all men are so despicable as your ex, you will see him as a horrible blot in your relationship something. Nothing more

Barrowgirl · 13/10/2023 15:56

Have all your exs betrayed you?

Pinkbonbon · 13/10/2023 15:59

When you are with a good man, in a healthy relationship, these thoughts probably won't bother you.

In a secure relationship, there is none of the drama or second guessing. You feel safe and secure and there isn't that 'on edge' and unsettled feeling that comes woth dating a manipulator.

Now I'm not saying you won't carry forwards any trust issues. But put it this way - your gut tells you when things were up with your partner before. You knew that text was dodgy.

Our body let's us know when shit isn't right. Have faith in it as opposed to choosing to ignore it. IF you get those vibes again.

But in the mean time, try not to overthink things.
Also, put some time into learning how to spot abuse and manipulation. Learn how to spot narcissists ect... so that you'll be more likely to date decent people in future.

Having the knowledge to better spot abusers really helps us trust ourselves. And that's the key, learning to trust our own judgement.

Tooearlytothink · 13/10/2023 16:00

I had an ex similar to yours. I was worried about how this would affect future relationships, I think it's natural to have that concern. However as soon as I met my now DH I just knew from his words and his actions that he was a completely different type of guy and simply wouldn't treat someone like that. Any doubts or niggles I had in the very early days were so quickly quashed by him repeatedly showing up in the right way. 5.5 years and one DD later that doubt has never had reason to set in again for even a second. It's out there, you'll know when you've found it & you absolutely deserve it.

HighywayToHell · 13/10/2023 16:05

I was with ex for 23 years and we had numerous instances of other women on the fringes. I was never allowed to look at his phone, it never left his side. Over the years i became paranoid, suspicious, anxious and mis trusting. It turned me into someone i didnt like.

Been with DP for a year and as a PP said i know by his words and actions he is not like that and i am not that person from before. I know his PIN for his phone but i have never looked at it, never felt the urge to. I trust him and know he wouldnt do that to someone.

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