Resentment over weekends away

[Teapotteapot76]

Hi all,

I have a 14 month old son, had quite a stressful period of nursery sickness and teething, so aware I am tired and run down. Does anyone have this.

I don't feel ready to take a weekend away break, as don't want to leave him for two nights. My partner is happy for me to do this, but I feel too guilty.

Problem is and I know this isn't great, is that I am resentful that he doesn't feel like this and is going away for a weekend in Oct and another one in Nov. It's like I'm resentful he is having that time away to himself and I can't have that (of my own doing). Argh motherhood is a ride! Ha.

Just wanted to see if anyone else is as crazy as me.

x

Don’t make a rod for your own back - you sound like you need a proper break and you’re not doing yourself, your son or your marriage any favours by burning out and then resenting your husband for it. Take the break! Go away for one night if two feels like too long to be away. Recharge your batteries and come back refreshed.

You are right that motherhood is a hard ride. Mother Nature does everything in her power to make sure that we bond with our baby, and it backfires on us when the bond is so strong that we don’t feel comfortable leaving them.

I agree with @Alphyn you will be making a rod for your own back and breeding resentment against your partner.

If you are not yet ready, then start making baby steps. It makes a big difference who is caring for your baby. Start off with evenings, then overnights, before it’s a whole weekend. it can be very good for a baby to get used to different carers.

In the future you should make sure that your son is happy to be left with his father so you can do solo trips.

I was like you but my sister wasn't. Irony is it's made no difference to the relationship between us and our children. If I had my time again I'd take the time and prioritise time with my husband.

Agree with others .. don't be a martyr - enjoy a weekend (or a night) away ... sounds morbid but I always thought 'how would my DC cope if I had to go into hospital or died I never wanted him to be over dependent on me and it was good for him to spend time with other people (has had no effect on our relationship - he's now an adult away on a stag weekend but happily texting me messages about the rugby ).

It sounds like a break is exactly what you need. Motherhood is only a part of who you are. Some time to get away and relax sounds blooming marvellous.
Dont lose your own identity striving for an unobtainable perfection

Well love you chosen to have kids ffs live with