Don't know what to do

[founta12]

Im absolutely lost tbh. Me and my DP have had a rocky few months. Every time we disagree it escalates to an absolute nightmare. Each time he threatens to move out and cancel our wedding. These are not major topics just general disagreements that all couples have.

We had a row last night. Something of nothing but quickly escalated into him storming off. I've tried hard to get this to stop last night and this morning, but he keeps going and going. His last message to me today was him saying he wants to cancel the wedding. He doesn't want to break up but wants to cancel it.

This was his last message. He's In work until late. I'm dreading him coming home, I'm even wondering that he may just not bother. I feel like my insides have been ripped out and I'm exhausted by it all. Struggling to hold it together and don't know what to do next.

Don’t marry this man.

Don’t get married, let him stay gone.

Yep, he will do this all your life.

Just pull the rug from under his feet, tell him you agree and you should cancel the wedding and actually he isn't the one for you, so you'd like to break up ....permanently!!

Cancel the wedding.

I would agree with the others. If it's this hard now, how do you think marriage will be any better or easier?

This bizarre behaviour has come from nowhere. It has turned everything upside down. It is like being with a different person.

1. Do not marry this man
2. Please leave this moody prima donna - it won't get any better.
3. Put you 'ducks in a row' and make plans to separate.

I'm sorry it isn't working out for you.

Either he's sabotaging the relationship because he wants out or there's issues which mean this relationship is no longer working for you both, it's for the best the wedding is off and the relationship, it's not doing your well being any good stressing about it.

@samestyle this is exactly what he’s doing. Call his bluff op and cancel wedding.

Not to sound like a complete cynic, but when behaviour like this springs out of nowhere it's usually because they're hiding something, and usually that something is cheating or another major betrayal. Read up on The Script. I'm sorry you're dealing with this man-child. Do not marry him

It's a punishment/blackmail/obedience tactic.

Fall in line or I cancel the wedding. He'll use anything he has leverage over you with in the future. This man is controlling.

Tell him you're cancelling the wedding (and do it ) watch him do an about turn and promise you that he'll change blah blah blah.
I agree with the pp , he's hiding something.

I’m sorry this is happening to you OP
He doesn’t want to get married.

His behaviour is appalling - Creating drama instead of being honest and respectful.
Let him go. You can do better.

He's panicking at the idea of the wedding and inventing excuses to get out of it. He's not brave enough just to say so. I agree with others. Just tell him the weddings off. You can't trust him not to pull this stunt again.

Call his bluff, cancel the wedding. This sounds like gas lighting to me, something he can hold over you when you disagree with him. To get you back in line, as it were. Cancel it all.

Yeah ultimately the guy wants to keep his options open. Have his cake and eat it. You're the placeholder. In his view you're not good enough for a lifetime commitment. It's also possible he is cheating, do your investigation for your peace of mind. This 'picking fights' behaviour doesn't spring out of nowhere for no reason.

He is treating you like a child, trying to control you, by taking away the upcoming 'privilege of wife status' if you step out of line.

You're much better off without him.

Cancel the wedding. You really REALLY DO NOT want to tie yourself legally to this man.