Hi, I'm a married male with 2 kids and I'm just looking for other peoples opinions on my situation at home.
It started a few months back , youngest child getting out of the baby stage both back in work and I started to notice the romance/intimacy wasn't coming back as quickly as it did with our fist baby ( It's been 2 years now) . I also noticed my wife pulling away if I tried to kiss her and making excuses for not wanting to touch me . She was also being critical of my actions saying I'm not doing enough to help, but when I ask what more I can help with she's not really giving me an answer . I'm involved with getting kids ready pick ups drop offs / house work / cooking / gardening and have always thought we made a good team but also willing to take on more if wife is struggling .
It got to a point where I was up at night franticly scrolling the internet for answers so I brought it up in a few emotional late night chats and she just passed it of as being too tired and so much going on.
Not happy with this and seeing some of the horror stories online I started to wonder if there is more going on and I decided I check her messages ( I know I shouldn't!) On there I found a few chats with male/female work mates mostly fine with me I don't mind coffee meets with other men if it's business like. One message thread caught my attention involving a guy she seems to know through work but doesn't work with . Some of the chat is just patting each other on the back about how good they are at their job or being a mum/dad / sharing pics of the kids but I noticed the text language was different here from other messages (very similar to when wife and I started dating ) There seemed to be a lot of excitement in them using smiley faces and kisses (X) . I read on and can see in the messages he's told her about him and his wife not getting on and then later them splitting up and she (DW ) has offered to support him ' If you ever need anyone to talk to you know where I am X' Around this time there is also a lot more messages from him like ' you just popped into my head X' or 'sorry was scrolling through my messages and called you by mistake X' and then an awful lot of excitement over meeting for coffee ' really looking forward to it X' /' Really looking forward to seeing you ' and then the later that night ' So lovely to see you X' / 'Really enjoyed it , thank you X' .
Am I just being paranoid? Would you be ok to find this ? I asked myself would I text married women in the same way and there's no way I would.
The guy seems to have found a new GF so the texts have reduced but I'm worried if things don't work out ... Just looking to see what other people think really.