I've been seeing someone on and off for a while now. Started off as nothing, became something, he messed up and now I see him when I can be bothered. I don't have a great deal of spare time, and would much rather spend my free time with my DS, so it works ok.
When we first met, we got on like a house on fire; would spend hours speaking about all kinds of random, interesting things. We both love music so would speak about that. We both exchanged experiences from past relationships etc. When we did get serious, his most recent ex of whom he'd been separated from over two years, and who is the mum of his youngest child, decided she didn't like he was moving on and caused a lot of grief. Above all else, her feelings were always placed over mine. When I questioned why we had to be so considerate of her feelings, I was told it was because she was the mum of his child.
Moving on, things were never the same after all the trouble caused, simply because I was targeted and never really defended. I would listen to him complain about her and be supportive when she stopped contact with their LO, and as soon as they were friends again, nothing against her could be said. It was during this time I think I fell out of love with him. I understand he was in a difficult position, but didn't appreciate the hurt and turmoil I'd be put through for no good reason. I decided to call it a day.
We've been back in touch around two months now, things died down when she heard I was off the scene and we decided to just go with the flow and see what happened. The problem is, whenever we're together (we can go a couple of weeks not seeing each other), literally all he talks about is his most recent ex, complaining about how unfair she has been towards him, how she's lied about him etc, but for the past month or so also, he has begun going on about his ex before her, who he separated from 8 years ago and has older teen children with. We literally sit together with him going on about how badly done to he is and was, for hours and hours on end. I try to move the discussion on to something else, but it literally returns back to his ex partners.
The last time I seen him, I tried to talk about something else. When I started a new topic, he tried to take the conversation back and I simply stated "that is all in the distant past now. Let's look to the future", and he just carried on, for another two hours or so. I find myself just sitting there listening to him nodding and drifting off in my mind. I feel awful for saying that, we all need support and an ear, but when it's literally the only topic of conversation, for hours on end when we've not seen each other for weeks, AIBU to just not want to hear anymore of it?