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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I can't draw a line

2 replies

Nowtwrong · 24/09/2023 17:28

I try to be as open a communicator as I can so when my DP has done something to upset me, I voice it as gently and clearly as I can.

DPs response is always a 'sorry, I shouldn't have done that.' Seems like a dream response though that being the end of the conversation feels like the situation isn't really resolved.

Today his mum said something incredibly rude directed to me about my parenting and DP walked off. I asked about it later and he said 'yeah, that was out of order'. I said I felt upset about this and sad that he hadn't defended me or stepped in in anyway. He apologised though when I asked why, he said 'well what do you want me to say?'

It's logical that nothing can be done about that specific situation that has now gone though surely the idea of these conversations help in future conflicts? I'm sitting in the kitchen now feeling low, though don't want to show this. I don't want to sulk though I feel I can't pick up any further conversation without coming across like i'm trying to cause friction. Is it unreasonable to want to talk through challenging situations to get a clearer idea of point of view from both parties?

OP posts:
BrightLightTonight · 24/09/2023 17:33

Why do you need you DH to fight your battles? If someone said something rude about you, stand up for yourself.

Nowtwrong · 24/09/2023 17:36

@BrightLightTonight I don't feel comfortable having any negative interaction with his parents. If one of my parents were rude towards my DP, I would 100% back him up and believe it was my place to do so.

OP posts:
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