I’ve been NC with my family for a few years for lots of reasons but I keep thinking about something they used to always do and it almost intrigues me ? I keep wondering what was the purpose of it if that makes sense !
By they I’m referring to my DM and 2 sisters. They would act as if I have no feelings at all? Emotional or physical and that things that applied to others did not apply to me (eg medical advice see one of my examples below) :
A few things that happened were :
As children we all had c pox - sisters were bathed with camomile teabags and layered in calamine lotion. I was told ‘just don’t scratch’ and when I complained was told the itching was ‘all in your mind’
If we went out sisters would get a drink? I was told that eating and drinking outside in public was ‘rude’
If dm and sisters cried at a film they were ‘emotional ‘ if I did I was ridiculed.
As a teen and then adult when I had period or pregnancy issues I was told ‘get on with it - you have to as a woman’ no kindness or support. When sisters were expecting dm was helping them and phoning me to say I had to help too !!!
After my second (I had an emcs) I wasn’t well and a family friend offered to pick up my eldest till I was ok (so either 6 weeks or till I could drive again which ended up being 4.5 weeks later ). Dm called her and said I was lying about a 6 week recovery and was just being lazy and she shouldn’t be doing pick up for me . A few months later one of my sisters had a c section and dm was phoning me to go and do her hoovering as ‘she can’t even lift the hoover as it’s a 6 week recovery’
was all this just to make me feel worthless. I’m not affected by it as have had therapy but I’m so interested in the psychology behind 3 people doing this / going along with it ??!!