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Original poster

Sudden strange behaviour confused me

27 replies

K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 08:44

Super confused a bit uneasy here even though nothing bad or serious happened.
My fiancee was at a work event this week (several days in a row) and was supposed to stay over last night as well. The event wasn't very far away but the last night usually entails a lot of partying, so he was going to come back home today and see me this evening. He called me last night to tell me that he'd decided to leave tonight already as he had missed me and hadtherefore decided not to drink etc, and that he wanted to come over. I was a bit tired and hadn't expected him, but I also thought that it was sweet that he had missed me. He sounded in good spirits and I said I'd wait up for him.

When he arrived I was he was buzzing with energy, and I mean buzzing. I first wondered if he was drunk or high, but I don't think he was. I even asked him and he denied it, and I believe him because he hates drink drivers and I have never seen him get behind the wheel intoxicated. He kept talking and talking how great his day had been, and how well his presentations had landed, and how he had shown up ("absolutely smashed") another guy in work who he is always clashes with. He was almost euphoric, and I don't think he even asked how my day had been. I was really, really confused and even said that HE probably looked bad if he had shown up someone else in such a public fashion, but he wouldn't have any of it and just stayed happy and wanted to go to bed.

He can be a bit of a dick at times, but he has NEVER been like this before, so I'm still wondering if he was high or if this was "just" euphoria. He left for work this morning and was still in a really good mood, but not as exaggerated as last night. I didn't raise the topic this morning, but will do it again at the weekend I think because I kept thinking about it after he had happily fallen asleep. I googled a bit and I do not like what I hear, but I appreciate that that's just the nature of the internet. This is not normal, right?

OP posts:
ChaToilLeam · 21/09/2023 08:48

Do you suspect cocaine use? That would be my first thought with this kind of odd behaviour.

Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 08:51

I was wondering about cocaine, and I know that he sometimes used it at work events, but I don't think he'd drive then. He seems to have left after dinner so likely before the real "partying" would have started. But I guess it's possible. He did fall asleep though

OP posts:
Toloveandtowork · 21/09/2023 08:55

Bipolar disorder maybe.

Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 09:50

I’ll look into it but I hadn’t noticed this type of hype before. Thanks

OP posts:
CitizenofMoronia · 21/09/2023 09:55

Hating drink drivers and not driving on uppers is probably not the same thing to his thinking, he sounds like he was on something to me.

thatwassociopathic · 21/09/2023 10:42

Mania or cocaine, but coke doesn't last that long so if he was still hyper this morning, maybe mania. If it is that he'll keep behaving oddly for a while so it will become apparent. Good luck

Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 11:19

Well I’ll keep an eye on it. I’m also uneasy that he was so happy about having been cruel to someone. Not normal

OP posts:
Ollifer · 21/09/2023 11:22

Ah well you've just said he uses cocaine which is quite a drip feed. However if he slept well and is still hyper this morning I'm doubtful it would be coke.

BIWI · 21/09/2023 11:25

What was the work do? If it was something super concentrated and (perhaps) highly creative, could it just have really energised him? I ask, as my business partner and I used to go to a week-long creativity conference each year, and when we came back into the office we were definitely 'not normal' (for want of a better expression!) for a few days Grin

Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 11:36

No it was a boring sales conference where a lot of big egos clash 🙄 but he did seem very proud of himself
Sorry I think I had originally made it more explicit in my op that he did sometimes take coke at these events though not always, but I had edited my OP. It was just odd that he decided not to stay and to be so elated.

OP posts:
NeunundneunzigHorseBallonz · 21/09/2023 11:37

I’d be looking for “Comedown Tuesday” if I were you. If he’s more tired and grumpy/depressed than usual on Tuesday, he was on coke or speed of some description. (Maybe even E.)

Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 11:42

NeunundneunzigHorseBallonz · 21/09/2023 11:37

I’d be looking for “Comedown Tuesday” if I were you. If he’s more tired and grumpy/depressed than usual on Tuesday, he was on coke or speed of some description. (Maybe even E.)

Thanks, then that should happen at the weekend. I’ll look it up and will check what he is like then

OP posts:
Justgonefishing · 21/09/2023 11:51

Do you really want to be with someone who takes cocaine at work events???!!

Theredfoxfliesatmidnight · 21/09/2023 11:56

This is textbook what taking cocaine looks like 😁

Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 12:05

Theredfoxfliesatmidnight · 21/09/2023 11:56

This is textbook what taking cocaine looks like 😁

🙁

OP posts:
Pinkbonbon · 21/09/2023 13:59

I dont think he sounds like he's been particularly cruel. Saying he smashed a rival by his good presentation? That's not cruel. That's a 'Well done you!' moment.

You sound like you were being a right downer. You're not one of those people who hate other peoples success are you? Because if I were him I'd be wondering that after your "it makes you look bad" comments. Yes, how dare anyone have an excellent day and win against the office prick for once?!

Maybe he said some other things that were particularly nasty that you haven't told us? Or yeah...maybe he was acting 'off' and you suspect cocaine? It's possible.

It's also possible he just had a great day and deserved better than his partners joy sucking.

sammylady37 · 21/09/2023 14:04

Your confusion is confusing. You’re in a relationship with someone who you know uses cocaine, particularly at these work events, and are seemingly confused when he exhibits signs of cocaine use after such a work event. Why are you confused about this?

Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 14:15

Pinkbonbon · 21/09/2023 13:59

I dont think he sounds like he's been particularly cruel. Saying he smashed a rival by his good presentation? That's not cruel. That's a 'Well done you!' moment.

You sound like you were being a right downer. You're not one of those people who hate other peoples success are you? Because if I were him I'd be wondering that after your "it makes you look bad" comments. Yes, how dare anyone have an excellent day and win against the office prick for once?!

Maybe he said some other things that were particularly nasty that you haven't told us? Or yeah...maybe he was acting 'off' and you suspect cocaine? It's possible.

It's also possible he just had a great day and deserved better than his partners joy sucking.

He didn’t “beat” him by having had a particularly good presentation. He humiliated him by going off script to make him look incompetent in front of everyone.
I don’t think I sucked up all the joy because he didn’t care and remained elated.

OP posts:
Original poster
K1nga23 · 21/09/2023 14:16

sammylady37 · 21/09/2023 14:04

Your confusion is confusing. You’re in a relationship with someone who you know uses cocaine, particularly at these work events, and are seemingly confused when he exhibits signs of cocaine use after such a work event. Why are you confused about this?

He has never gotten behind the wheel when drinking or doing drugs. I asked him because I was confused and he denied taking anything which is why he had decided to come home.

OP posts:
MumTeacherofMany · 15/01/2024 12:38

Cocaine

Pumpkinpie1 · 15/01/2024 17:07

How did he get to your house OP ? Does he use public transport or does he drive?
If it’s the latter I think you need to rethink your statement

Csharpminor · 15/01/2024 17:49

Women are too suspicious when a man is happy. Let him have it for once :)

egowise · 15/01/2024 19:25

What's on your head, in your heaaaaad

ZOMBIE

IDontHateRainbows · 15/01/2024 20:00

thatwassociopathic · 21/09/2023 10:42

Mania or cocaine, but coke doesn't last that long so if he was still hyper this morning, maybe mania. If it is that he'll keep behaving oddly for a while so it will become apparent. Good luck

Who's to say he wasn't doing cheeky lines on the sly?

Burntouted · 16/01/2024 04:42

He's great success and feels proud of himself, accomplished, and in a fantastic mood.....

...and you automatically assume that he's took drugs and perhaps drunk..up there googling and asking strangers...

Sounds like you may be perhaps jealous and would prefer him to be monotone or in a down mood.

These are terrible accusations, and for someone who's in a relationship, you're unsupportive and very negative.

He needs to drop you.