Don’t have time for my friends

[swimminglessonadvice]

Last week I was walking down the road and bumped into a friend. When the kids were younger we were at coffees, playgroups together a lot, we live in the South but we’re both Northern. We share a sense of humour.

issue is over time her kids are boys mine are girls and we just don’t share hobbies. It was really emotional when we saw each other we just clasped hands! We are both so busy with work and kids, this isn’t my only friend like this and I feel so good when I see these friends/bump into them but have no time to see them.

not sure what I want from here but feeling a bit emotional!

Yes its hard. Can you meet up without the kids. I met my friend in april could go months again but hers bit younger. Then wends is sport. Its leaving nobody with free time

I guess we could but it’s be here or there and never have the time to invest. I always end up spreading myself thin as a result!

Can you make a regular but infrequent arrangement. (Eg a meal out together every other month)? Or a night away at a spa every 6 months.

I think you have to make time as otherwise wont happen. I try plan cinema or something otherwise the year passes by.. are kids young op

Find the time. I didn't and regret it badly. Make 6 month arrangements

Yes you’re right, really need to. Our kids are now at diff schools too so no quick catch-ups possible. I just got so emotional after seeing her and realised how much I missed her.

So many friendships I’ve thrown away as life takes me in diff directions.

so many friends from school, uni, different work places I can’t keep in touch with everyone.

I feel lucky I made so many friends, DH main friends are his school friends and uni friends which is easier as they get together in a group.

Make the time. It will be worth it.

Sent her a text for a coffee/walk and some dates

Well done op. I do think it is natural to loose friendships as time goes on,
butbwell worth putting effort into those that really matter.

Invite her round for dinner. You've got to cook and eat anyway so you might as well just do a little bit more.

Make time. You sound like a great mother but your kids will fly the nest. Even an hour here and there to meet. I’ve got a friend and if it proves too difficult I FaceTime her and we have a virtual coffee xx

I’m sure you can fine one weekend afternoon to spend an hour with her. Even if you do errands together - go and buy school uniform, Christmas shopping - you can do bother.

I am sure you can really make time if you wanted too. It's really rare to find friends you can still catch up. I hope you see each other again.

Of course you have time.

invite her round for dinner or drinks or coffee.

It's great that you have come to this realisation and that you have reached out to her!

As a woman with two newly grown up kids and recently divorced from their father I can assure you that the one thing I am so unbelievably grateful for is that I have maintained my friendships. I would be a very lonely and miserable person without them right now. Besides my kids, they are my world.

I did a list (a hefty list) of friends and I think I’m
just spread too thin but I know i’m also blessed to have met so many wonderful people over the years that I can count as friends, we are meeting for lunch soon, she also said she’d been thinking about me since she saw me, it was like a strange rush of emotion when I saw her!

thanks for the advice.