Really need some outside perspective on this - it’s a long one!
My partner called me manipulative, selfish, a weirdo, emotionally unintelligent and the list goes on.
He has quite a traumatic past with a ‘narcissist’ who has completely destroyed his relationship with their daughter which is really damaging but I feel like I’m getting the brunt of her wrongdoings!
I recently took my bad mood out on him I suppose you could say by being a bit off, maybe a little snappy. At the time, my response was “well I’m not being shitty with you” and he immediately got defensive about this which then turned into a full blown argument. Later on when discussing this and after I had apologised for him getting the brunt of it, he asked me whether I agreed that it was manipulative that I “denied” it. Apparently I gave a politicians answer by explaining that in the heat of the moment it’s hard to recognise that someone else is unfairly getting the brunt of something and that we all do it, him included. He also said that he’s seen a different side to me, I’ve deflected, I’ve ruined the weekend, he has doubts about me in case I turn out to be a manipulative person like his ex, I’m stupid, emotionally unintelligent for trying to understand exactly what triggered him.
To me, this is so insignificant and minor but has been completely blown out of the water and I’m starting to question my sanity! He’s generally so angry and has a lot going on but I can’t help but feel like I have to justify why I’m not like his ex over things that are so small.