Last year my husband started using a certain drug and his addiction has just progressively gotten worse. He has also turned the front and back yards of our home into a hoarder mess. Every time I tried to talk to him about it he would deny and lie. Sometimes he would just get in the car and leave. I brought up my concerns to his mother and it turns out that his whole family saw the change in him too.. For father's day this year we went on a trip with his family and he did not have this drug so he went through withdrawals. We ended up having to take him to a clinic which was expensive and honestly traumatic. When the trip was over I talked to him about going to rehab and he refused. He said he wanted to try and get clean on his own which I knew was not likely to happen.
I've known my husband since I was 16 and he knew I grew up in a hoarders home with two drug addicted parents. This whole situation is becoming unbearable for me. I told my husband at the beginning of our relationship that I could not be with him if there was drug use. Since he refused rehab and has made no progress on getting clean I told him I couldn't stay with him any longer. Now that I'm done he is planning to go to rehab and keeps saying that he would only go if I agree to stay. He also tells me I'm a bad person for wanting to give up on him and leave him at his lowest. I understand this is manipulation and I've made my mind up. I just can't help but feel like maybe I am being a bad person. There is more to this story but this is all I can write for now. Thank you.