The ‘itch’

[HappyHippy1234]

Hi all,

I’m 39, been with long term partner 12 years, no kids, 1 dog and a house.

He’s a good person, I think he tries but I’ve got a serious ‘itch’ and I’m not particularly happy in our relationship. BUT could it just be time/age? I’ve read a few articles about the 12 year itch taking over the 7 year itch, and a lot of people seem to break up at around my age…. So I’m wondering if it’s just a ‘thing’ that happens when the planets align kinda thing? Possibly a touch of mid life crisis!

What difference does it make what you call it? You're not happy.

I personally think that you fall in & out of love multiple times across the course of a long relationship (I’ve been with OH 18yrs &also your age). I guess it depends how not happy you are. I don’t know if “itch” is the word but it may well be a phase that passes. Me & my DH had marriage counselling around 5yrs ago - we weren’t massively rowing or anything but with 2 young kids I think we’d just lost our own connection. The counselling was so valuable. Maybe worth a conversation?

So you need an excuse.

An itch period could come at any time during a relationship, so no it's not an official term that gives you a get out clause for bad behaviour.

If you are not happy leave.
Who will get the dog ?