For reference I have autism (waiting for assessment, DCs are autistic) and ADHD (definitely). Matched with someone in a different city about 6 months ago. I have gone to stay with him 4 times (I am happy to go to him as where I live is very small and gossipy). We slept together after 3 dates spread out over my first visit which was for a long weekend, I went to where he lived in a group and split off with them to see him. After first and second visits we exchanged lots of sweet nothings but he kept saying how surprised he was that I was into him because it didn't seem that way. This was fair enough, as I do shut down and go virtually mute when I really like someone. So I kept saying how much I liked him, how hot he is etc. This latest visit I got a few messages straight after I got home then no messages for a week. I messaged him today and had a bit of back and forth, I ended up saying how much I'd enjoyed the sex this time. (It wasn't massively weird or kinky but it was very intense / kind of rough - consensually so, we discussed beforehand and were both sober the whole time.) He replied to me saying he felt "relieved" because he thought he'd "been rubbish". I asked him what on earth did he mean by this, how could he possibly think that as I'd said how amazing it was at the time. Now he's not replying. I'm starting to feel like he's just doing this kind of act where he says he thinks I didn't like him / I thought he was rubbish and then I end up rushing to console him and salve his ego by apologising for making him feel that way and saying how wonderful I think he is. I am very stressed and confused now because he's not replied to say where he got the idea from that he had been rubbish or that I had thought he was (there was some issue with quite relatively premature ejaculation on a couple of occasions this last visit but it was quite minor, he still lasted a while; I think he must be referring to the 'rough' sex as it was the first time we have done that). Am I being taken for a fool here? On the one hand I'm happy to be complimentary about someone I had a great weekend with and I am falling for but I am also feeling kind of manipulated? Has anyone else experienced similar? For the record I am 41, he is 45. We both have 2 tween DCs each from prev relationships but are nowhere near the stage of meeting each other's; it has been a kind of fwb situation and not even sure that I want more than this. I just want to be treated fairly and don't know if I'm BU for asking him to share more feelings than he is comfortable doing or he is for making me feel guilty / worried / sad then not replying. Thank you for reading this far!