Is it what you call controlling ?

[Mimi198]

Hi,
I had two dates with this guy. On two different occasions, when we were crossing the street, a car was going too fast and both times, he putted his arm in front of me to protect me. The first time I tought it was cute but the second time....I'm a 33 years old! It sound a stupid question and there is more important things in life but I'm really curious about what you think of that?

If all he did was instinctively put a hand out to a perceived danger I wouldn't call that controlling.

No it's not controlling. He's trying to save you from harm. You have seconds to react in a dangerous situation and he's not going to waste those seconds thinking I wonder if she's seen the danger or think nah, she's old enough to look after herself.

I think it's more illuminating you didn't consider looking out for him, just yourself.

I wouldn't call that controlling no. It might just be a reflex reaction of his.

I can understand how it might come across as infantalising. But probably is just a genuine anxiety he has about road safety.
If he shows other signs of being controlling then maybe.... but if its just this id not think that it was

Why you think this is controlling is beyond me.

Yeh, your boyfriends being totally controlling by stopping you from being run over twice. Much better to be hit by a car than a man try and prevent you from getting hurt 👍

I’d say it was instinctive. Does he have children or nieces/nephews that he has regular contact with? Even more likely in that case.

Sounds like he’s trying extra hard to be gentlemanly on your first couple of dates. Don’t give it another thought.

This is a completely green flag, and naturally nice thing to do. Protecting you from danger without forethought.