Would you get eggs frozen?

[Dottheeye]

Last year I left my long term partner as he didn’t want more anymore kids and I don’t have any. It was a very hard time, we were both very upset about it and it took a while to untangle our lives etc. I have since found it very hard to try and move on as I still feel connected to my ex. As far as I know (through mutual friends) he hasn’t met anyone else either. However, I am now 38 and I’m worried I won’t be able to open up again emotionally in time to establish another relationship for kids to be an option. So I’m considering freezing my eggs but not sure if it’s worth it or what it involves? I wish I could be one of those people who can bounce back quickly after a relationship ends but I have always needed time to feel ready again. It’s just unfortunate time isn’t on my side. Just wondering if anyone else has gone through similar and what you decided to do?

Definitely research and speak to some clinics, but the success rate would like be quite low - just to be honest with you.

@Peony654 yeah I had read the success rate isn’t great but it’s weighing up the cost of it all against having that extra back up. In hindsight I should have done it years ago.

Do it! You won't regret doing it, but likely will regret it if you don't. I've done 8 rounds of IVF, so am very familiar with egg collection. It's not bad at all.

@KvotheTheBloodless yes you are probably right. How long does it all take and how invasive is it? I’m also thinking of the work aspect as well, taking time off etc.

No I wouldnt, because it doesn't work. The technology isn't there yet.

There are some figures here - it's pretty much a 98-99% failure rate in terms of getting a baby at the end. https://www.bbc.com/news/health-51463488

I might consider sperm donation to freeze embryos if you are set on children. Much better success rate (although still not great). Or use a donor and have a baby solo if children are really important to you.

Personally no. I don't agree with injecting yourself full of shite for the possibility of currently non existant people. I also disagree with ivf and even tbh pregnancy in general though. I think the whole lot of it is an unnecessary risk.

The majority of people who have kids these days probably never should have anyway. Thats not a criticism of all parents, some of them are great but the kid still ruins their relationships and stunts their dreams, careers and social life, health and mental wellbeing. I think most of us would wise to skip it. But even more so if it involves pumping your body full of crap beforehand.

I did it age 34- glad I did but met my babies father later that year so haven't used the eggs yet, but if I meet a new partner one day I might need them (I'm late 30s now). Costs about £5k total including all the injections and check ups and £300 per year freezer fee after that. You can get it free or much cheaper if you agree to share your eggs (possible not at your age actually that might just be under 35s).
My advise is to go to the initial consultation and get the fertility check up- they'll let you know what state you're in and whether you need to freeze immediately. If you don't then I'd go back for that check up every few months. But at 38 I think it's the ideal time as egg quality is only going to get worse and you could meet your dream partner or decide to be a single mum by choice at 44 and you'll kick yourself if it didn't work.
It's by no means a guarantee though btw just an extra boost chance of it working

So it takes 2-3 weeks of injecting yourself and going for a scan evey couple of days, then the collection is quick procedure under sedation yoh test at home after and feel ok the next day

Not much point. Eggs don’t freeze well and you’re at the point when the majority won’t be of a sufficient quality

Success rate is not great for frozen eggs. However frozen embryos are much much better if you would want to consider a sperm donor. I would not waste money on frozen eggs tbh. But obviously the choice of using a sperm donor is very personal and you would have to be prepared to parent solo as well.

The reading I've done makes it sound like it's not worth it. There is not strong data to support frozen eggs leading to live births. If I was you, I'd save your money and throw yourself into making a life worth living for yourself now. You could always meet someone that way. If you would want to be a mother by yourself, I'd contemplate that too. It's hard isn't it, being late 30s and without kids?

Freeze embryos, not eggs.

Thanks everyone. There have been times in the past where I’ve wondered if I wanted kids but I think as I’ve got older I’ve realised I do want a chance at having a family which is why I left my ex. But if I can’t find that right person then I know solo parenthood from the off wouldn’t be for me, I would just accept it wasn’t meant to be. I just worry that if I do meet the right person it might be too late. But as others have said egg freezing doesn’t seem very successful in comparison to the cost of it.

Egg freezing would be successful if you were in your 20s, sadly at 38 (look at ivf egg conception rate stats) it’s a low maturity and then eventually fertilisation rate. Remember it’s not just about freezing the eggs and then defrosting them it’s about them being viable embryos which they might not be able to turn into as they are older v a 20 year olds.

At 38 perhaps best bet is to take as good care of your health as you can - exercise and healthy eating- and really prioritize dating being very clear on what you want etc to maximize your chance of meeting someone special and getting rid of anyone who isn't right quickly!

Id get a sperm donor and try to conceive. Freezing eggs is a waste of time.