Please please please help!!! BIL has left SIL - dire situation - long

[Wolfgirl]

What can we as a family, do to help??? we are 160 miles away. SIL has been sick since birth, advised NOT to have children as she has a heart condition, had two anyway etc. which means she has never worked and very dependent on her DH. lets take the D off that eh!

BIL has been having an affair with a young woman, but claims it is only a friendship. A friendship that has now split the marriage.

As a family they are on the poverty line and live off benefits. He has a job bringing home £1200 a month. He has a mother too who despises my SIL and now relishes the marriage breakdown. she has TWO houses, and has allowed BIL to go live in one of them, for a small rent etc.

Today we hear that BIL will only give SIL £100 towards the rent, no food, bills, support for kids.

Us, as a family are not struggling, but our income meets our outgoings. We have already paid one lot of rent for her last month, and we cant continue to bail out.

Please!! what should we do immediately ? who should we contact?

any advice would be very very much appreciated.

TIA

Get down to the housing department and put in an application for housing benefit and council tax benefit immediately. She should also advise that she is a single adult household now too.

She also needs to apply for income support and child tax credit straightaway. If she has a serious heart condition, she may be entitled to other benefits such as DLA but she would need to get that checked out.

CAB can give advice.
Is she physically dependent? Will she need practical help - shopping etc? If she contacts social services they might be able to offer some support.

CAB, BENIFETS OFFICE COUNCIL TAX AND CSA

Would she consider relocating so she can be closer to people who can help her?

And get her to get the CSA involved. Men who think they can just walk away from their financial responsibilites make me sick. They should go to friggin' jail, imo.

she needs to apply for

Housing and council tax benefit
income support.
incapacity benefit
child tax credits

she can get all of those forms from her local jobcentre.

on her form for IS there will be a form for CSA.

If she has internet access, she could get the ball rolling this weekend with applications for the CSA and emailing the housing dept.

Housing benefit and council tax benefit are dealt with by the local authority. Jobcentre can help with other benefits, although tax credits are dealt with through HMRC - can be applied for online. I suspect she is already in receipt of CTC and her ex may be claiming WTC. She should notify Inland Revenue of her change in circumstances immediately - especially the fact that her ex has left as he will not be entitled to WTC any more.

the forms for housing benefit are included within the income support application pack.

Right, I need to answer your questions, but DH is dragging me out the door to take kids for walk to woods.

Please dont go away, I need this advice and will be back later this afternoon.

But, thank you so much already. I will read as soon as we get back. thank you

Apologies for the absence. A quick update.

We actually went to visit SIL, as things were such a mess. SIL and BIL are on what I call the poverty line, mostly benefits etc. BIL does have a job but low income. Seems that they have a big debt, and SIL has been sitting on a debtors letter warning her to pay up or they will send in the bailiffs. Shes had this since mid-Feb. (she was too fearful to show it to her DH, as things were already very tender/raw between them)

DH ran her round the banks, DHSS... everywhere we could think of yesterday, and hopefully we have managed to get things rolling for her.

Please can I thank you lovely ladies for all the pointers and advice, as I had no idea where to start.