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Original poster

am i being unfair about first date?

29 replies

rehive · 22/08/2023 16:10

Asking for opinions on a couple of things. We both have dogs and for our first date he invited me on a dog walk... a dog walk. What are your thoughts on that? Is that a normal thing? I wasn't keen but did obviously do it and the compliment he has given me after the date is "you have such nice teeth" TEETH. Smile would have been nice but teeth? Are these things that would put you off?

OP posts:
Glitterb · 22/08/2023 16:14

Have you met online? If so then I don’t think there is an issue with a dog walk for a first meet up at all. I only ever did a quick coffee or dog walk for a first meet as there is no pressure to stay long if you don’t like each other.
As for the compliment, I don’t think I would be put off at all. He probably tried to say something nice and it has come
across awkward.

Aworldofwonder · 22/08/2023 16:16

I think this is nice and not a particularly unusual suggestion. Nice teeth is personal and flattering too.

It sounds like you're not keen to be honest.

spilltheteapot · 22/08/2023 16:18

This first date idea sounds like a remnant of the covid era. I don’t think it’s a bad idea but perhaps you should chose the second date!

roses321 · 22/08/2023 16:19

Imagine if you were a man for a second, and how much it would cost you to take women all out for meals and spend money on them for a first date. You'd feel that was unfair no?
A dog walk is perfectly reasonable, and he's complimenting you on your teeth which is far nicer than "you have nice tits" which would be inappropriate.
You sound unreasonable to me.

arethereanyleftatall · 22/08/2023 16:20

A walk in a first date is absolutely my favourite thing to do.

flipent · 22/08/2023 16:21

Think a dog walk is a brilliant first date!

Complimenting your teeth is unconventional, but not rude or offensive.

I'd be perfectly happy with both.

Livelifelaughter · 22/08/2023 16:26

Yep I think the dog walk is absolutely fine as you both have dogs, it's trying to find a common connection.
Teeth - I think he would have been better off saying nothing at all. If you see him again I would expect him to up his game.

Original poster
rehive · 22/08/2023 16:29

no we actually did meet irl through volunteering but I left so gave my number and we basically just built up a better relationship through texting

OP posts:
TomatoSandwiches · 22/08/2023 16:29

Dog walk fine, the teeth comment would make me laugh and I'd put it down to nervousness or is he a dentist?

WatieKatie · 22/08/2023 16:32

One of my best first dates was dog walking. Beats sitting in a dark coffee shop trying to think of conversation.

Redpepperss · 22/08/2023 16:33

Teeth is unusual because I find not everyone has good teeth. It seems random but I get compliments on my teeth and asked to even write down what toothpaste I use!

Cloudsandrainnotsunandsand · 22/08/2023 16:36

When I met dh I told him honestly if my ddog didn't like him we had no future... A ddog walk is a totally acceptable suggestion... And if you DO have nice teeth isn't that good too?

determinedtomakethiswork · 22/08/2023 16:41

You can say dog, you know!

yellowsmileyface · 22/08/2023 16:42

Lots of people do walking dates for a first date, and I think a dog walk is cute as you get to meet each others dogs.

The teeth thing is an unusual compliment but I wouldn't be offended by it. Perhaps he specifically wanted to steer away from the more generic nice eyes / nice smile compliments.

How was the date otherwise? If you like him and you had a good time, I certainly wouldn't write him off over these two things.

letmesailletmesail · 22/08/2023 16:52

One of my friends always does a dog walk as a first date. This started in Covid but she's kept it up. I thought it was a bit odd but, when she explained it, her reasoning was sound! Her theory is that, if it develops into a relationship, you have to like each other's dogs and the dogs need to like each other, how someone treats their dogs and manages their dog on a walk can be quite interesting, if the person turns out the be the dullest person ever, at least you can talk about the scenery - and you'll have had some exercise and got your dog walk done! It was at that moment that I clicked how OLD is really a process and a numbers game in the early stages with romantic dinners and things further down the line.
The teeth thing is a bit odd though unless dentistry came up as a topic of conversation. Was he a bit nervous perhaps?

VictoriaVenkman · 22/08/2023 17:01

It wouldn't impress me. I'd prefer a coffee or a drink as a first date.

BigPussyEnergy · 22/08/2023 17:05

I wouldn’t be impressed but I don’t have a dog. Also I’m unfit as fuck so wouldn’t want to be huffing and puffing while trying to hold a conversation!

I did agree to a walk for a first date once but met at a pub for a drink first and managed to keep him there for more drinks and dinner instead of the walk Grin

If I had a dog I’d be ok with it I think. And given the number of men who turn up with gross Or missing teeth, maybe women are the same and he was just relieved! Do you have any smiling pics on your profile? If not he may have been imagining the worst.

Pinkbonbon · 22/08/2023 17:17

Tbf I suppose its important your dogs get on. But for me I think I would have suggested coffee date first and left the dog walk for a bit.

As for the compliment...
I've noticed this thing lately where men just...don't, anymore. The last guy i had a date with however, said 'I like that you keep your nails so clean'. I mean, nails ffs xD

Its been making me a little worried lately that I'm going on dates and there's not so much as a 'you look nice!'.

Here's me hoping it's a collective thing haha

feelingslightlyhorrified · 22/08/2023 17:20

I think a dog walk is a really nice non-pressured first date. If it turns out you have nothing in common, at least you'd be able to talk about dogs. For me, that'd be far better than a meal or a coffee where you run the risk of awkward silence if there's no chemistry.

As for the teeth remark - a bit bizarre but maybe he's just a bit awkward and says the odd weird/nervous thing.

Doesn't sound as though you particularly liked him though?

Gwenhwyfar · 22/08/2023 17:29

roses321 · 22/08/2023 16:19

Imagine if you were a man for a second, and how much it would cost you to take women all out for meals and spend money on them for a first date. You'd feel that was unfair no?
A dog walk is perfectly reasonable, and he's complimenting you on your teeth which is far nicer than "you have nice tits" which would be inappropriate.
You sound unreasonable to me.

Don't people split the bill these days?

Maddy70 · 22/08/2023 17:29

That's a really nice first date. I would jump at that. Your dogs have to get on too!

roses321 · 22/08/2023 17:30

Gwenhwyfar · 22/08/2023 17:29

Don't people split the bill these days?

Show quote history

It depends what you accept really, but for me on dates, if they ask me out then split the bill, I don't see them again.

viques · 22/08/2023 17:31

Great idea, no awkward silences, or trying to think of topics, just walking and a bit of dog talk if things get too silent. And I notice peoples teeth, but probably wouldn’t mention them to be honest.

Gwenhwyfar · 22/08/2023 17:31

"if they ask me out then split the bill, I don't see them again."

Oh dear. Men do more of the asking so if you go by this rule they really would end up paying a lot more. Do you often ask men out so that you also get to pay for first dates?

VeridicalVagabond · 22/08/2023 17:34

Aww I love a good dog walk, and the teeth thing just sounds like an awkward attempt at a compliment which I'd probably find quite charming. My husband's first compliment to me was "you have very nice cheeks" which I thought was so cute and ridiculous.

If you're not keen though, you're not keen, and that's ok.