Sulking husband

[Bilbel]

Help !
I am away on holiday with my husband I treated him for his birthday we got here last night and he has not said three words to me, his behaviour is narcissistic and my anxiety is through the roof, I have said if you are unhappy here there is a flight home but he just shrugged that off I don't know how to respond to this behaviour I feel like crying but I won't but what should I do ...

You need to move this to the relationships board

Not sure spooner corner will get you much help (unless he’s sulking because he has a giant boil on his bum🤷‍♀️). Ask them to move you to chat or relationship board.

Personally I’d just fuck off out for the day, enjoy myself and leave him to sulk. Don’t let him ruin another minute of your holiday. If he wants to act so pathetically and not enjoy his away time that’s entirely up to him, you have no obligation to let him ruin yours too. Seriously, just pretend you are on a solo holiday and have some fun. He “wins” if your time is miserable too. Fuck him.

Hello there, @Bilbel , we've now moved this over to our Relationships thread. We hope you get some useful advice and support here.

So, you paid for this break as a birthday treat for him and he is sulking like a horrid brat? Just go out and enjoy your day without him.

His sulking is surely a very unattractive trait! Is he 13 years old? Ignore him. If he asks why then tell him.

Does he have form for this? My exH did. It's absolutely soul destroying and it ground me down to a shadow of myself. I lived my life on eggshells, trying to guess what I had done wrong. When he was happy I still walked on eggshells to try and avoid setting off the emotional isolation again.

OP, I cannot stress enough how damaging this is. If it is a pattern of behaviour it is horrific and it is abuse.

It totally destroyed my self esteem. I'm having counselling, after finally kicking him out 6 months ago.

15 Emotional Effects of Stonewalling in a Relationship - Happier Human

You need to avoid his presence -how will you do that?
Go home early?
Book trips etc that take you out all day?
Get a good book by the pool?
Also don’t respond to txts etc

This needs to change -start now

Go out and enjoy yourself. Book a day trip, go shopping, sit by the pool with a book and a drink. Whatever.
He is behaving very badly and should not be approached. The mantra is to leave a man in his cave and go and gallop across the prairie. Ie don’t pander to him, leave him to stew till he comes round and go and have a good time.
Alternatively, leave him there and come home.

I wanted to add, I know the people saying 'go out and enjoy yourself, ignore him' mean well. If you're living with someone like this it is not so simple. As soon as they start with the silent treatment your anxiety goes through the roof. For me I'd physical stress symptoms (like IBS). I couldn't possible relax enough to read a book. I'm so sorry OP, it's just awful.

Get yourself a good book, and if you can go lie by the pool and read, or sit in a cafe or go site seeing. Just leave him to be a miserable twat on his own and make the most of your break.

Help! Would love thoughts on this. I've been with partner for 18mths. Both in our mid fifties, old school friends who reconnected. After 9mths of dating he moved in with me. He left his old town and moved to London. Both our families were happy and good times. I always knew he loved a drink but since living together full time I've noticed he drinks every evening. 1 bottle of wine (sometimes more) a night + more weekends. The moment he gets home he starts drinking. He didn't get on well work wise in London so has now moved back to old town where he had a well paid job and is lodging with an old girl friend and comes home weekends. I've also found out he takes cocaine occasionally, also he drops this off to his brothers ex wife. I've discussed how this makes me feel and boundaries have been crossed. He said I've got trust issues and it's really not a big deal.. It all feels so immature and icky.. I'm so angry, I'm not a big drinker but recently have had too much to drink and now started accusing him of all sorts.. this isn't me!! He's now blaming MY drinking and behaviour for the break down of relationship. I have a beautiful family, run a business and was very happy single before he come along. I feel hood winked and betrayed. He's now left and other than one txt me telling him what I think of him ive gone no contact. He was a good man!! Worked hard, booked us holidays etc.. he's reached out twice to say how good our relationship is / was .. Be a shame to end it bla bla.. I really think what he's done is terrible and can't be with him. He seems to think I'm over reacting and causing unnecessary drama.

@Yay68

It would be best if you started your own thread about your relationship, as it's very different from the OP's.

Go to the top of the screen and there's a blue button "start a new thread", click this, choose a topic area, eg relationships and off you go

Wow thank you as that is exactly how I feel I have spent the day on my own something I have never done but actually not as bad as I thought ... three glasses of wine down but yes egg shells all the way and a big fat divorce coming his way his behaviour is so narcissistic and I have to put my big girl pants on and do what's best for me and it's certainly not paying for holidays to sit on my own ... I could be with my kids !!!

Enjoy yourself and leave him to do what he wants etc

Thank you x