New baby

[HGNewMum]

I’m looking for advice for new parents. We’ve just had our first baby 6 weeks ago and now we’re settling in to some sort of routine I’ve noticed how hard it is to have some sort of relationship with my husband. I feel like we’re co parenting well, managing the house fine and he’s been absolutely wonderful looking after me during a difficult recovery from a c-section. I know I’m very lucky too that he’s working from home 3 days a week and has taken annual leave for all his in person days so I’ve barely been alone for more than a few hours.

However, I feel like we’re really not connecting properly anymore. I’m not talking about sex- I was very unwell during pregnancy so we had a really long pause and still felt very connected. I’m hoping mumsnetters will have some advice on looking after relationships once a baby arrives. I know we’re both exhausted but I still want to feel like we’re a couple and not just coparents so any advice on baby friendly dates etc to help us reconnect will be greatly appreciated

Congratulations!

Not sure if this is what you had in mind, but appreciating the joy and love shown by my DP to my new baby was very special and helped me feel more bonded to DP.

Ultimately you’re a family now, not a couple, so if you can, appreciate the new relationships between the three of you.

In terms of dates, we still went out but took DD with us.

I would keep mindful of this (both of you should), but I’d also park worrying about it for now. 6 weeks is tremendously early days and really you can’t expect anything much. Take it a month at a time, keep talking, being affectionate with each other and get intimate again as soon as you both feel ready.

I don’t think me and DH could even get through a film or dinner together until our twins were about 6 months old. One would wake up or one or both of us would fall asleep!