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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How to get over my ex

1 reply

username098765 · 16/08/2023 09:18

We split just over a month ago. He has now finally moved out. I am really struggling to even get up and go to work. I know deep down it was the right decision but it doesn't make it any easier. I just don't know how to move forward. We were together nearly 9 years but luckily have no DC together. I keep trying to look into the future but I just can't see one without him. We have so many fantastic memories and quite a lot that aren't so good! I think secretly deep down I'm hoping he will realise his mistakes and we could be together and it would all be amazing but I know that won't happen and actually I don't think I want it to. I'm trying to keep busy but some day I physically can't it's just too painful. Guess I just need some reassurance that I'll be ok and some advice on how to move forward.

OP posts:
Cluedup81 · 16/08/2023 10:14

It sounds really cliched, but time will help you heal. It’s still really raw and you need to allow yourself to grieve your relationship, even if it wasn’t all that great. Human bonds are really powerful and so the end of any relationship is immensely painful, but it really does get better over time.
Be gentle with yourself, do what you need to do to process the grief. Writing things down, good and bad and reaching out to trusted friends can help.
You need to start planning your life for you now, this can help you shift your focus on yourself, what makes you happy, what have you missed out on? Start preparing to do more for you, you start to realise it’s a real gift x

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