If you don't drink, how do you spend time with your partner?

[Summerishere123]

DH is a newly recovering alcoholic. When we had childfree nights we would go for a few drinks or go for a meal.
This is no longer an option. Meals will hopefully be again but not when its all so fresh and everyone around is drinking.
So what else can we do together?

I don't drink (anymore).

Park Run, other volunteering, bowling, cinema, walking, geocaching, watching box sets, doing elaborate cookery or making preserves, gardening and DIY projects, theatre etc.

Go for a run, cinema, gig, have friends round for dinner, see friends at their houses (alcohol doesn’t have to be involved)? Tonight we’re going to an outdoor film screening. Later in the week to an arts festival in another city.

Ideas off the top of my head

Cinema
theatre
walking
Coffee shops
bowling
Golf...or driving range
spa

Go for a run or a hike, go to the climbing wall, bike ride, theatre, art exhibition, mooch around new areas, coffee shop, gigs

We rarely drink unless we are on holiday here's some ideas ☺️

• we love to cook together, sometimes we pick a random country and will do a starter, main and dessert all from scratch

• movie night, normally can fit 2 in a weekday evening but if its weekend we'll have a proper movie day if the weather is bad and he picks one, then I pick one and so on until we are tired.
• on nice days / evenings we head to the beach, take a couple of folding chairs and take our books. have taken a little bbq before and had that on the beach
• we were (not anymore) members of the national trust and that was great for some days out and visiting new places
• we are really good (bad) when it comes to TV shows, we like to binge watch them 🤣 there's so many series that we love and if you've got some snacks you'll be well away.
• walking, we have alot of nice places to walk and stop off for a ice cream

Really hope things go well for you both ☺️xx

I drink very occasionally but my partner doesn't drink at all.
We do trips to the cinema. Walks on the park. We're both into photography so we take pictures and then develope the film together (not for everybody but maybe you could nurture a shared hobby?). We exercise together, go on days out to nature trails in summer and museums in winter. Shopping trips. Gigs if you dp can resist the bar. We play a lot of board games, not old ones but modern ones, they're quite good fun. We have a boat and we take that out if we're feeling adventurous. I usually bring a flask of coffee if I'm going to be out for a long time as well, which can make walks etc feel more special.

DH & I don't drink much - me hardly ever. Our child free nights include:

Going to the cinema
Going to the theatre
Going to see a comedian
Going to an exhibition
Going to a convention
Going to a concert
Going to a friends house for a board game night

We've also done museums, courses, tours, board games, computer/console games, watching TV, cooking, gardening, DIY, walking, visiting gardens, etc

Pretty much anything & everything. A good night/day out enjoying each other's company doesn't require alcohol.

Cinema, watching a band at a local venue. theatre, games nights with friends, quiz evening at the local village hall. gym, diy project, gourmet cooking nights together in the kitchen. I am teetotal and have been for years. dont like pubs see no point in visiting them.

Thank you everyone.

I found walking or cycling a wonderful way of passing an evening and chatting. I do live in a place with walks and rides from the door though.

Get a dog? We spend hours walking through dog....and talking about the dog....

In early recovery, places and activities not associated with drinking. Ideally something new that helps lift mood in a healthy way, so gym, walks, trying some new outdoorsy thing like sailing.
Otherwise, cinema, theatre, cooking, or a DIY project together.
Later down the road you can introduce events where alcohol is present in small steps, and for short periods. However you may need to accept that big pub nights with friends may never be on the agenda again, as some people find they can never tolerate these sober.

We have a few restaurants that don't serve alcohol, in major cities there will be late opening coffee shops/dry bar places (harder in small towns).

I'm often driving so go to all the normal places and don't drink (eg cinema, bowling)

I also find proper restaurants easier to avoid alcohol and more pleasant than pub type restaurants (I do drink just never when driving and it's horrible being around drunk people when you are sober!)

And remember many others don't drink for a variety of reasons, they still enjoy life (my mum hasn't drunk alcohol in 50 years!)

Cinema, walks, cafes

Paddleboarding, surfing, camping, hiking, volunteering, mocktail making, glass blowing, silly ghost tours, comedy club, body painting, sushi making, rage rooms, art gallery events, scavenger hunts, pottery classes....

Wow. Who would want to go drinking with all that on offer! You sound like you have a fabulous life. Jealous.

Cinema, theatre, walking tours, galleries, museums, hikes in the country, concerts.

We go out for food even when not drinking.

We have other hobbies individually but those are the main things we do together.

We’ve stopped drinking whilst TTC, we still go to the pub or restaurants but appreciate that might not work whilst he’s in early recovery. Otherwise - cinema, theatre, galleries, walks, shopping, bike rides, do DIY or gardening. I go to a choir and play tennis, DH plays golf and football