I can't take the pain of splitting up with someone I love

[andithurtswitheveryheartbeat]

Like my title I literally can't stand the pain and keep thinking of ways to end things but I can't as I have children.
I know I won't do it I don't think I just wanted to be truthful in how I'm feeling.
I'm trying to break away from someone I love but doesn't value me or even respect me.
I have always been left, all my life.
Family, friends.
The pain hurts my throat and aches my heart.
I can't stand being rejected and not loved anymore.

You can never figure out why you are stuck if you don’t break free.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP.

It does sound like this break up is triggering things from your past/childhood around rejection and being left?

You say yourself he doesn’t treat you right, so logically you know you’re doing the right thing but it is painful, and feeling it so deeply makes me think there’s more to it. There is nothing wrong with you, you deserve to be treated with respect and you’re worthy of being loved just for being you.

Is counselling an option for you?

Thank you. I am doing the right thing but I can't handle my feelings. I can't rationalise them it just hurts so much.
Starting counselling next week I really hope it helps.

How old are your children. Remember they need you and love you. Do you have close family x

Thank you. They are teenagers and brilliant kids really. I just wish I wasn't just such a fuck up with my relationships for them too

If they are teenages then just explain how you feel to them. Im sure they will undetstand. Or at least help you. Please stay strong for them. Do you have anyone you cant turn to for help and support in real life x

they won’t care one bit about your relationships. They’ll just want you and for you to be happy.
It can really be one of the toughest things to go through. Have you got anyone you can talk to while waiting for counselling? I think the best thing I always found was to keep busy, even though my mind would wander, I would try and do something. Or making a meal with my favourite music. Something distracting. Then just taking each moment as it comes. Take your time and be kind to yourself. Best wishes.

Please talk to your gp who can refer you for counselling it helped me when I was heartbroken with a little baby x

Evening, @andithurtswitheveryheartbeat . We're so sorry you're feeling so low. We have to say though, the fact that you're here, asking questions, and seeing a counsellor, tells us that you're a wonderful mum. We hope you can focus on those very successful relationships that you have with your kids, rather than the relationship causing you so much pain. They sound like top class kids, too.

We can see you've had lots of really good pieces of advice and support here, too. In the meantime, we wanted to post a link to our Mental Health Webguide. There are a few numbers there that might be of use in a tight spot.

We hope things start to come together for you again, anyway. Much love from all at MNHQ.