Should I try again?

[JilltheGrand]

Hi all- I’m a lurker but this is my first post - some opinions welcome! I can be a bitch, but can’t we all. Partner of 10 years can be incredibly mean with words & never apologises & IMO possibly slightly narcissistic. He’s a delight in company, I feel at times on eggshells around him & always feel i compromise for him ( he’d argue differently). It’s all come to a head recently & after 10 days of him ignoring texts ( we don’t live together) I as usual said sorry just to keep the peace. ( he also told me he would have continued ignoring me until i said sorry). Normal- ish service resumed. Until he took offence at an eye roll emoji I used. Apparently this is unacceptable. And he’s since muted me. I called him, he berated me, I told him I can’t deal with his games anymore. But to throw away 8 years, should I ignore my ego & try ( as I know he won’t contact me) or am I just asking for more damage? I’m worried maybe I am the toxic one who’s misreading it all ? I’m utterly heartbroken & lost.

@Lookingatthesunset xx

Oh, fuck that for a game of soldiers.

He's a twat and you're worth 100 of him. That's why he always knocked you down - so you didn't realise it.

He thinks he's controlling this. But you've dumped him. Stick to it.

It’s just the fear of the unknown. You will make a new life, new friends connect with some old ones. You will be fine x

Thanks @NeverDropYourMooncup . Finding it hard today, keep crying, doubting my decisions and remembering all the nice things he did

Thanks @Somewhereovertherainbowweighapie

What nice things? He's had you walking on eggshells, he's never admitted he was wrong or apologised for doing something unkind or unpleasant, he's made you grovel for his forgiveness on multiple occasions, he's selfish, egotistic, takes offence at anything other than abject adoration, made you lose contact with your friends...the occasional present, decent sex or other crumb of affection doesn't cancel out the level of unhappiness, insecurity and fear he brought into your life.

@Lookingatthesunset @JilltheGrand Thank you hopefully get sorted eventually.

Yes I have solicitors and luckily I instructed early on as they have a full picture of what's happened. The upshot is she took offense to me standing my ground and wanting to see the children on my own without her manipulation so she took everything and made false accusations.

Nothing to police or Social Services, I have no record, I was a SAHD and I already had them on my own for a few hours previously but it happened in a matter of weeks. I've seen them for ten hours in total, two on my own. So now, she has legal aid who have threatened me with restraining orders if I go anywhere near them or the house or contact. If I do get one that will go against me with court so I'm stuck.

Solicitor been trying for months to arrange any form of contact been refused, won't even allow phone calls. So, yeah my children essentially have no father for all they know and they also have no family either on both sides.