Should I call it a day.

[Nomatterwotudo]

I've been with my bf now for 5 years and we have a daughter who will be 2 next month I also have 3 kids to my ex partner whome I was with for over 10 years. My older kids all have one or more additional need that can be a struggle for any parent. What my issue is my current bf just moans and goes on at my older kids about leaving stuff all over the house but he does it too I know I can forget to put stuff back sometime but you should lead by example that's the way I've been brought up. The other week we had a massive fall out and I said I've had enough it's like I have a 5th child. He works full time plus does a delivery job two evenings a week he never helps with my older kids and sometimes he doesn't even help with the baby unless I have a meltdown and then he leaves the house and doesn't answer his phone just leaves and waits for me to calm down. I feel like he is a lodger not my partner. I had to leave my job because my eldest ASD and ADHD has just got worse and worse and I have to support my child but he has a go if things are on the floor or we don't have food in coz I haven't got to the shop but he drives I don't he could go. I feel like I'm moaning but I'm soo unhappy I just want to be able to end things on good terms but I know what he's like and when he's upset or angry stuff gets broken and I've just had enough. I want to be friends for the kids sake I've had all mider in the past I just want a peaceful life. Should I call it a day. Xoxo

I feel like I'm moaning but I'm soo unhappy I just want to be able to end things on good terms but I know what he's like and when he's upset or angry stuff gets broken and I've just had enough.

You absolutely need to end this relationship. It's making you miserable and modelling to your children an unhealthy, unhappy relationship that based on the above (you saying he breaks things when he's angry) is also abusive. He's also a shit dad who doesn't proactively help with your youngest child, who is also his.

The fact he breaks things when angry is concerning as that is abusive. I would advise calling Women's Aid for advice on how best to leave the relationship as safely as possible.

What is your housing situation? Is it in your name or both your names?

I couldn't be with someone who didn't bother with all the kids in the house it would just annoy me.

The house is in my name I just feel like I've given too many chances.

You absolutely need to end this relationship. It's making you miserable and modelling to your children an unhealthy, unhappy relationship that based on the above (you saying he breaks things when he's angry) is also abusive. He's also a shit dad who doesn't proactively help with your youngest child, who is also his.

The fact he breaks things when angry is concerning as that is abusive. I would advise calling Women's Aid for advice on how best to leave the relationship as safely as possible.

Would you be willing to speak to them tomorrow? I think you should and then you can get a plan in place.

Your poor kids shouldn't be growing up around this relationship, it's so damaging to their futures being shown that this dynamic is in any way acceptable.

It's also scary enough as an adult when your partner is breaking things in anger (my ex would do this). I can't imagine how scary it is when you're a child and don't have the choice of whether to stay or go.

This whole situation isn't fair on them.

I have spoken with my partner in the last hour explaining how I feel and all he has said is what am I meant to say or do. I've just asked can we sort out stuff out that we have before the school holidays end I don't want to drag this on or have any more stuff damaged which I've told him is unfair but his worst trait is he just sits there so silent it worries me what he is even thinking by ut the sooner he leaves the better. I will try speak with women's aid now if they are still open Iay take the youngest out in her pushchair just so I can talk but thank you to anyone who replied I knew I couldn't carry on like this it's making me sick.